


Faults for Fixing

by beren



Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Alternate Universe - Canon, Fix-It, M/M, Mutant, Slash, Telepathic Sex, Telepathy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-21
Updated: 2011-07-21
Packaged: 2017-10-21 15:04:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/226532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beren/pseuds/beren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rewind and Replay

**Author's Note:**

> Loved the movie, thought it was absolutely brilliant and this started out as a one scene PWP about the power dynamic between Charles and Erik. However, then I wondered what Charles would do given a second chance where he had seen all his faults and Erik's starkly laid out and was then returned to before all the bad happened. This is what happened when I started typing. Thanks to Soph for the beta.

Charles blinked and found himself staring up at a ceiling that was not familiar. He automatically searched around with his mind and found familiar mental signatures; he was at the CIA facility. Only that shouldn't exist anymore; Shaw had destroyed it, hadn't he?

Charles was confused.

Then the most amazing thing happened, his foot itched and he wiggled his toes. He sat up so fast his head span and then he laughed.

They were all there, including Darwin and they were all alive and well. Reading one of the guard's minds, he realised it was September and then he remembered using Cerebro to touch a mutant's mind. She had only been fifteen and he had barely skimmed her thoughts, but she had dragged him in somehow. She had told him her power was the ability to show those who needed it their probable future and Charles came to the inescapable conclusion that he had just seen his.

He could not and would not let it happen.

Climbing out of bed, he untangled himself from the monitoring devices, recognising Hank's handy work, and then he focused on Erik.

[ _Erik, it's time to pack, we're leaving._ ]

[ _Why? What about Shaw?_ ]

[ _I know how to find Shaw,_ ] he responded, [ _I'll explain later. Just make sure everyone is ready to leave._ ]

[ _Where are we going?_ ]

[ _I'll explain on the way._ ]

"Charles, you're okay."

He met Moira in the hallway.

"I'm fine," he replied as he headed away from the medical facility towards what was his room at the complex.

"Shouldn't you wait for Hank to make sure?" Moira asked, following him. "He said something about psychic shock."

"I wasn't in shock," he said, walking into his room, "I was mentally living over two months in time I don't intend to allow to happen. Trust me when I say, it's better for you and for us if we leave now."

He pulled clothes out of his cupboard and began putting them on, regardless of what Moira might or might not see.

"You can't just go," she protested, "what about Shaw?"

"Erik said the same thing about Shaw," he said and pulled off the pair of pyjama pants to switch them for something more outdoors, "and don't worry, we'll deal with him."

"If you do that you'll be vigilantes," Moira told him, "the government won't stand for that."

"The government won't stand for us anyway, Moira," he replied, placing a hand on her arm. "I'm sorry, but I saw them try to destroy us just for existing even after we prevented a nuclear war. We are leaving."

Then he lifted his fingers to his temple and stepped inside her head and carefully removed most of the information about himself and all the other mutants.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, "but I can't take the risk."

Then he packed, leaving her sitting on his bed with a dazed expression on her face and went to find the others.

"What's going on, Charles?" Raven asked as they met in the rec room.

"I'm an idiot," he said simply, "and we're going somewhere safe."

"What happened to you?" Erik asked, catching him by the arm before he could lead them out.

He looked his friend in the eye and remembered the beach; it tore at him even in the memory. There was no way he could let those events play out.

"I saw our future," he said, being perfectly open and honest, "and I didn't like it."

"Where are we going?" Raven asked.

"Home," he said simply and headed for the door. "Hank, how long will it take you to get rid of all the records of us here?"

"All of them?" Hank asked, shocked.

Charles nodded.

"Um, a few minutes."

"I'll keep everyone away, take Alex and do it."

The whole group were looking at him wide eyed.

"Let's get outside," he said, turning towards the main entrance, "we can meet Hank and Alex there. We'll need to pick up Sean on the way."

"Who's Sean?" Raven asked.

"The next mutant we were going to pick up," Charles replied. "The CIA know of him, so we can't risk leaving him where he is just in case someone goes to look."

No one argued with him.

As he walked he created a field around them that totally hid them from all personnel in the complex as well as keeping everyone well away from Hank and Alex. His mind was working on so many levels he had never felt quite like it before, but he led the others right out the front door. As they exited an army truck pulled up and the driver stepped out and handed him the keys before walking blankly back into the building.

"How are you doing all of that?" Darwin asked, clearly astonished.

"I learned a few things," he said, climbing into the driver's seat.

Everyone else piled in and as soon as Hank and Alex appeared and joined them, Charles drove away, towards what he hoped was an entirely new future.

~*~

"This is yours?" Sean asked in a rather startled voice as they stood in front of the mansion where Charles had grown up.

"No," he said; "It's ours," and he meant every word of it.

Finally he had a use for the cavernous house that had stood empty apart from the caretakers since the death of his mother.

"Honestly, Charles, I don't know how you survived. Living in such hardship," Erik said and Charles just grinned, because he'd known that was coming.

Of course it wasn't quite the same, Darwin and Angel were with them and Moira wasn't, but it was better.

"Well, it was a hardship softened by me," Raven said and hugged him and then led everyone off for the tour.

Charles placed his hand on Erik's arm, holding his friend back and allowing the kids to go off and explore.

"Are you going to explain?" Erik asked once the youngsters were out of earshot.

"Yes," Charles replied and indicated the garden.

It was coming on for evening this time, but the sun wasn't quite down. He led Erik to a quiet spot next to a walled garden and sat himself on the low wall and waited until Erik leant next to him.

"I do not want to lose you," he said plainly and Erik frowned at him.

He meant it in more ways than he was sure Erik was thinking, but he waited for his friend to respond.

"What did you see?"

"Pain," he replied, "for me very literal, for you figurative, but equally as destructive. I was an optimistic fool and you gave in to your anger. I refuse to believe we cannot find a middle ground."

"You said you know how to find Shaw," Erik said, going to stand up.

"I do and he is far too dangerous to allow free; he wants to destroy the world," he explained as directly as he knew how. "His way helps neither us nor the normal humans; he's insane. The mutants with him are our kind, brainwashed by Shaw's ideology maybe, but still our kind, we should all be on the same side."

Erik blinked at him, clearly surprised by the vehemence of his words.

"Since when do you advocate us and them?"

"Since I saw their fear first hand," he replied. "We are the future, solidarity will be our strength and secrecy our weapon. Humanity is not ready for us yet, but we are ready for them."

"You want us to hide?" Erik sounded completely averse to that.

"I want us to prepare," was his firm answer. "Humanity is evolving, but they cannot evolve if they are extinct. Open war will hurt both us and them."

"We should not be ashamed of what we are," Erik said and went to walk away again.

"I'm not, are you?" Charles challenged.

"We look normal," Erik pointed out.

"Which is why we must protect those who do not," he insisted. "I have been wrong, I know that. Encouraging Raven to look normal all the time was wrong. I understand that now, I can see that, but exposure to the general public can only hurt her. We can build something where those who cannot hide their mutation, may find a haven. We can train mutants to take advantage of their difference and keep us all safe. Then, when there are too many of us to ignore, when we are strong, we can show the world where evolution is taking us all."

Erik said nothing, but did not walk away. This was the tipping point, Charles could feel it and he waited.

"I am here for Shaw," Erik said stubbornly.

Charles stood up, relishing the ability to do so. He stepped right up to Erik so they were as close to eye to eye as they could be. There were so many things he could say, so much he could tell Erik, but when it came down to it, it was just a debate about methodology. It didn't actually cut to the heart of what he was thinking.

"I am here for you," he said and then threw caution to the wind.

He took hold of Erik's jacket, stood on tiptoe and kissed the other man square on the lips. His usually ordered brain caught up with what he had done several seconds later. Erik just froze and Charles drew back, for the first time in his life, terrified to read another person's mind. He did not even know how to read the confusion in Erik's eyes and he waited.

"I ..." Erik said and clearly didn't know what he was trying to say.

"I watched you walk away from me, hide from me," Charles said, baring his soul because it was the only thing he could think to do, "and that hurt more than a bullet in the back. You told me we wanted the same thing and I told you we didn't, but I think we can."

"Are you in my mind?"

Charles shook his head.

"You have to tell me."

Erik looked into his eyes as if testing his resolve and Charles held himself firmly in check. Then he felt himself being pulled forward by the metal on his clothes and he went with it. When Erik kissed him, he felt he world narrow down to just the two of them and the need to open his mind almost overwhelmed him. He wanted to know and to feel, but he just about managed to stop himself following his instincts.

"May I?" he asked breathlessly breaking the kiss momentarily and holding onto Erik's face with his hands. "Please?"

"Yes," Erik whispered back and then kissed him again.

Charles touched his temple and let his barriers fall and he was engulfed by everything that was Erik. At this range and with his sudden lack of control it was quite directly mindblowing and he gasped, clinging to Erik as if his life depended on it. He had never opened himself quite that much to another person and he felt himself go weak.

"Woah," Erik said, catching him as his legs threatened to give out. "Charles, are you alright?"

[ _I've never,_ ] he tried to explain as Erik helped him sit on the wall, [ _you ... wow._ ]

It was his turn to be lost for words.

"What did you do?" Erik asked him.

[ _I let go,_ ] he replied, unwilling to release the mental contact completely for reasons he could not fathom, even as he pulled his mind back under control. "I'm sorry if ..." he began to say aloud.

"You do not need to apologise," Erik said, still holding him by the shoulders even though Charles knew he could have coped quite well on his own now.

Erik was looking at him very seriously and it was more than a little unsettling. He knew Erik was not angry, he could feel that, but something was going on inside Erik's head, something he did not dare dip into.

"You love me," Erik said eventually and Charles felt his heart leap into his throat.

He nodded, not actually able to say the words. The time he had spent with Erik seemed like years not the weeks it had been. Erik was the most compelling person he had ever met and he never wanted to let go.

"I am broken, Charles," Erik said, "I can never be what you want me to be."

"What I wanted you to be," he replied. "The man I was yesterday is not the same man I am now. I'm sure you will still think me an idealistic fool, but I understand much more now. I've seen their fear on a grand scale, I've felt it. I know we cannot be what I wanted us to be, what I dreamed, but I want you, Erik, just as you are. I will take the broken you over anything else."

Erik frowned, still confused.

"What did you see?"

"They turned us against each other, Erik. They pushed us so hard and so far that we became our extremes. We cannot let them do that. Shaw's death will not bring you peace ..."

"Peace ..."

He placed a finger on Erik's lips.

"I know peace was never an option, you told me that the night before we went after Shaw," he said. "You didn't let me finish."

He waited for Erik to nod for him to go on.

"Shaw's death will not bring you peace, but it might bring you security," he started again. "If that's what you really want, what you need, I will help you. I will hold him motionless while you put that damn coin through his brain if you want me to, just please, please promise me one thing; never shut me out. I don't think I could bear it, not again."

The thought of losing Erik filled him with more horror than losing the use of his legs and he would never be able to explain why. He and Erik had connected on a level he had never experienced before and not just because of his powers either. Society said it was wrong, but society could be damned as far as Charles was concerned.

"How did you know that's how I wanted to kill Shaw?"

"Because I held him while you did it last time, only you couldn't hear me begging you to stop. You shut me out and it was worse than feeling that coin go right through my skull because I was in his mind. I'd never been shut away from a mind I cared about before then, I never want to be again."

It honestly shocked him, how much it had affected him. He had been completely off his game on that beach, stunned almost and not because of everything else that had happened. Losing Erik, being cut off was what had sent him reeling; he could see that now. He could have stopped Moira firing, distracted Erik in a different way, chosen his words so much better, but he had been so shaken and confused he had failed. He had failed Erik, himself, everyone and he was not going to do it again.

When he had woken up, all he had thought about was getting them all somewhere safe, but now he had a chance to think about everything. He realised belatedly that he might actually be having a mini-breakdown, which was so not what he had planned.

"I think perhaps we should take you inside," Erik said, looking at him critically.

"Tea's supposed to be good for occasions like this," he replied absently.

"I was thinking more of scotch," Erik told him and gently urged him to stand up.

"That could work."

~*~

He was halfway through a large tumbler of single malt when Raven walked into the study. Erik had suggested a game of chess to help him settle his thoughts, but when he'd lost in four moves they had both realised he was definitely not in the right frame of mind. He'd been lost in thought since, mostly just staring at his drink and mentally assimilating himself back into real life while Erik had sat there like a comforting statue just letting him. He had no idea how long it had been.

"Right," Raven said, making him snap out of his thoughts, "I want to know exactly what is going on with you two and why it means we are suddenly no longer working for the CIA."

The way she glared at him was so normal that it actually made him smile.

"I touched a mutant's mind with Cerebro," he said, "she showed me the future, the next two months or so to be more accurate. Bad things were going to happen. What have you done with the others?"

"I allocated them rooms and left them to settle in. Erik, yours it up the main stairs and fourth on the right," Raven said without so much as stumbling over the change of subject. "Everyone is getting an early night after all the travelling, but don't think that explanation is going to be enough, Charles."

He indicated one of the spare chairs.

"Why don't you sit down," he said, feeling much calmer than he had done.

"So tell me," Raven said as she sat down.

"I am not going to tell you exactly what happened," he replied, "you honestly don't want to know, but suffice to say, Darwin died and I lost you, Erik and Angel. I am not allowing that to happen again."

That shook Raven to the core and she did not look as if she believed it.

"Lost me?" she asked in a small voice.

Charles gave her a sad little smile.

"I've been blind, haven't I?" he said and reached out a hand towards her. "I've never understood what it's like for you. To take us back a while, if you weren't my little sister would I date you if you were blue? Back then, no, because I was a fool, right now ... in a heartbeat."

Before his eyes Raven went from blonde to her natural form and then his smile wasn't so sad.

"You never have to be anyone but you for me," he told her and then his eyes flicked over the Erik, "but, please," he added, remembering Raven coming to talk to him in the kitchen, another conversation he had messed up, "no matter what Erik says, please would you not walk around naked. My delicate sensibilities are just not ready for that yet."

Raven appeared shocked again and looked over to Erik, who also seemed a little surprised.

"Naked?" she asked looking back at him.

"I think you were making a point," he replied and smiled a little more. "A point well made, actually, but one I fear I cannot handle just yet. Erik, while far wiser than me about such things, does not have to deal with being your brother."

He was pretty sure he was blushing, which made Raven smile in a not altogether settling way.

"Naked," she said again and he groaned, because he was positive he had just put ideas in her head.

"Please," he all but begged.

"Don't worry, darling Charles," Raven said and patted him on the hand, "I won't ... as long as you tell me what you saw in the future."

He went to protest.

"Not the details," she said before he could, "just the general idea. I need to know, you're so different."

It was not an idle request, that much he realised and he sighed and nodded. He had never really been able to deny Raven things she really wanted and so he formulated a very edited version of the future he was working so hard to avoid. Some of the information Erik needed to know anyway and he sat back and began talking.

~*~

Frankly, after talking to Raven, Charles was exhausted, at least mentally. He was well aware that the mind had great control of the body, so he wasn't overly sure if his limbs felt heavy because he just wanted to be able to shut off his brain, or if he really was that tired. They had been travelling for a long time, but he was usually a good traveller.

"You look like you could do with some sleep," Erik said and made him remember that he was not, in fact, alone in the room.

He'd drifted into his thoughts again it seemed and he looked up and smiled at his friend.

"I do feel a little thin," he admitted, rubbing the bridge of his nose and his forehead.

The scotch was a nice warm buzz in his bloodstream by then, but it wasn't overly helping his ability to stay awake. Standing up seemed like such an effort, which is why he didn't move until Erik stood and offered him a hand. Yet again he couldn't help the little thrill he felt when he was able to climb to his feet and he wondered how long that was going to last.

He still felt as if he had lived over two months no one else had and it wasn't fading away at all. If he wasn't careful he might start believing it was a vision that was not going away until he had completely thwarted it.

They slowly made their way out of the room and Erik shadowed him all the way up the stairs to his door, at which point he woke up enough to make another decision.

"Would you like to come in?" he asked very seriously.

"You are about to fall over," Erik pointed out, not actually answering the question.

"The mind is an amazing thing, my friend," he said with a small smile, "it can override just about anything the body is telling it."

He didn't ask again, he just looked and waited. When Erik didn't move, he opened the door to his room and stepped inside, leaving the door open behind him. He did not need to turn to know that when the door clicked shut again, Erik was on the inside.

"What do you want from me?" It was a typically Erik type question.

He touched his temple.

[ _I want you to stay,_ ] he said and projected as much of what he was feeling as he could without overwhelming his friend.

Erik gasped just a little, mouth opening in shock for a moment.

"What was that?"

"That was me, the real me," he replied. "You're always saying we should not hide, well I'm not hiding anymore. When we first met what you did to me fascinated me and scared me; I refuse to be scared anymore."

"Why me?"

"Because I touched your mind and you dragged me in. The first moment I sensed you I felt a connection I have never experienced, not even with Raven. Your rage was so complete it should have been a wall, but I was sucked right through. I still can't explain it. I mean, bloody hell, I jumped into a completely black sea for you and I'm not prone to such heroics."

Erik was back to staring at him again and giving him a look that was probably disagreeing with the heroics statement.

"I want you with every fibre of my being," he said, stating it as plainly in words as he could, "and this time I'm not going to deny it."

The lock clicked in the door and then before he could think, Erik was descending on him. He found himself grabbed and kissed, hard and demanding, and his mind just kind of filled with white noise. For a few seconds he couldn't think, all he could do was feel.

"Is this what you want, Charles?" Erik asked, breaking away and holding his chin in a vice like grip.

It should have made him nervous, the intensity in Erik's eyes should have been positively terrifying.

"Is this what you want?" he shot the question back at the other man.

Neither of them answered, at least not in words, but Charles couldn't help himself, he began to pull desperately at Erik's clothes. Erik was not far behind and he felt his fly begin to open by itself and his belt to release, while Erik's hands wormed under his shirt. All his fatigue was forgotten and all he wanted to do was get at Erik's skin.

Clothes went everywhere and Charles was no surer how he got out of his shirt than he was about how he managed to pull Erik's turtleneck off without accidentally strangling the man at the same time. It was like a fever burning through his mind as he desperately sought physical contact. He found himself naked and being pushed back onto the bed without actually being certain of how it had all happened. However, all he really cared about was the fact that Erik climbed on after him.

When Erik kissed down his neck and then bit him, honest to god bit him, he wanted to make some quip about vampires, but his ability to form coherent sentences was long gone, so he just gave as good as he got. He noted absently in that part of his mind that he never could get to shut up that this was more than a bit like puberty all over again, what with the complete hormonal freefall, but this time he was loving every second.

Ever since Charles had figured out that there was a difference between what people wanted and the fantasies they might broadcast during sex, he had counted himself as an exceptional lover. He was sensitive to other people, it was in his nature and he had always used that to his advantage, and theirs if his little black book was anything to go by, but all that subtly was out the window as he rutted against Erik. Primal need was the only thing worrying him.

Erik forced a knee between his legs and pushed him down onto the bed, lining up their cocks side by side as they pushed desperately against each other. This was them at their most fundamental and Charles was utterly intoxicated by it. His carefully practiced focus, his trained-in, physical cues to control his mutation were all worth so much squat as his mind flared open without him being able to do anything about it. He didn't have to worry about prying though, because Erik was working on just the same primitive level he was, so all he was flooded by was more need.

That's all there was and he desperately shoved his arm between their writhing bodies, wrapping his fingers around both their cocks. Erik growled and still didn't stop moving as Charles held them in a firm hand.

It was electrifying and totally without finesse. The combination of pure desperation and physical sensation also didn't take long to throw Erik over the edge and Charles followed about a microsecond later, because, even if he hadn't been right there anyway, that much input blew just about every brain cell he had.

For what seemed like an age he had no idea where thought and reality joined and there seemed no divide between what was happening in his mind and his body. Only slowly did he return to himself and realise that he was lying next to Erik on the bed in a sated, sticky mess.

"Are you back?" Erik asked as he blinked at his lover.

That made him wonder how long he had been out of it.

[ _Yes,_ ] he replied, because, quite frankly he couldn't be bothered to move.

It was only after he did it that he realised it had taken absolutely no effort and he had not used a single one of his focusing techniques. He had slipped into Erik's mind as easily as his own.

"I think maybe we needed that," he said with a small laugh, more to distract himself than anything else.

Erik just snorted and flopped onto his back on the bed.

"You have a talent for understatement," was the dry response.

Charles let his eyes wander over Erik's lean and chiselled body. There were scars over Erik's skin, memories of things Charles had seen in Erik's mind on that first night. Fear pushed Erik on as much as fear would push humanity if allowed, and Charles made a vow to himself to let neither need to act on either fear.

"You look like you are thinking serious thoughts," Erik said and made him look up.

"I was," he replied, but then smiled, "but that's for later. I find I am not tired at all anymore, how about you?"

Then he pushed himself up and over Erik and kissed his new lover soundly; everything else could wait until morning.

~*~

Charles was on cloud nine as he bounced down to the dining room to find some breakfast. He knew Raven had decided to be domestic, because she had woken him half an hour earlier with a mental prod to tell him what she was doing and to get his arse out of bed.

The fact that he had woken up in Erik's arms had started his day brilliantly, even if it had been a little early for his taste after the long day before. Who could have guessed that Erik Lehnsherr, bad arse Nazi hunter, was a cuddler? Apparently not even Erik if the man's blush had been anything to go by.

What he found in the dining room caused him to pause and tone down his own enthusiasm just a little, because everyone apart from Erik and Raven were there, but they all looked somewhat subdued.

"Good morning," he said, trying not to sound too much like he had just had the night of his life, "how is everyone this morning? Settling in okay?"

Angel managed a smile, but the boys just kind of grunted at him. He had no idea if that was normal or not; he wasn't used to young people quite like them. University students yes, but then there were usually hangovers involved and he was pretty sure no one had raided the cellar yet.

As he walked over to retrieve some food, he surreptitiously did a quick scan to make sure there were no problems.

[ _Hell, what do they put in the water around here?_ ] came from Angel.

[ _I haven't had dreams like that since I was twelve and had just discovered what my penis was for,_ ] was what Alex was thinking.

[ _Must be the country air,_ ] came from Sean's mind, at which point Charles clamped all his mental controls firmly in place and desperately tried not to blush.

It occurred to him he might have been projecting his desire the previous night and that was just awkward. He only prayed he had not managed to relay any details.

Raven stepped into the room and smiled at him; at least she seemed bright and breezy. Of course Raven had figured out how to shield her mind from accidental intrusion a long time ago. It was definitely something for the curriculum, if he could just figure out how to explain why without bringing up his sex life.

"Good morning," she said and placed a plate of semi-cremated toast on the sideboard, "you're looking more with it today."

"Oh I am," he said, hoping she didn't notice his embarrassment, "I definitely am. Ready and willing as they say."

Of course that was the moment Erik chose to arrive. Charles grabbed some random food items and fled towards the table, praying that nobody asked awkward questions. He and Erik had just agreed to keep their new relationship private for now and the last thing he wanted to do was out them on the first morning.

Thankfully he needn't have worried, Raven beamed at Erik and then fluttered like a moth to Erik's flame. Charles really couldn't throw stones since he felt like doing the same thing.


	2. Rewind and Replay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See ch 1

Two days later they were all settled in, the house was habitable and everyone had started their training. Erik obviously wanted to know more about Shaw, but had agreed everyone needed to be in better shape first. Since they were sharing a bed nightly, he was pretty sure Erik was not too annoyed with him for not giving up the details. With the practicalities out of the way Charles was now dealing with everything else.

"Hank, can I speak to you for a moment?" Charles caught up with the young genius heading towards the room Hank had chosen for his lab.

"Oh, yes, of course," Hank said, stopping and turning, clearly having been in a world of his own.

"It's about your serum," he said and gently guided his companion to keep walking.

"It's going really well," Hank said, brightening instantly; "I think I've almost isolated the correct sequence."

"It's not going to work," Charles decided to be blunt to be kind.

The smile fell off Hank's face.

"It doesn't eliminate the mutation, it strengthens it," he explained. "You definitely found the right part, and you were genuinely magnificent after you decided to use it, but you were blue, with fur."

Hank was a scientist, there was no point in giving half truths.

"Really?" Hank sounded shocked, but nowhere near as horrified as Charles had expected. "It must have pushed my physical mutation to its limits."

Of course, Charles should have known Hank would take it as an intellectual puzzle.

"Maybe Darwin's mutation would help," Hank said, clearly thinking all sorts of scientific type thoughts, "with his adaption abilities it might be workable."

Charles could keep up with Hank when he wanted to, but that wasn't his aim this time.

"You know," he said while carefully steering Hank into the lab, "Raven might not want to be normal now that she's among mutants."

Hank looked a little conflicted at that.

"Hank, we've all been isolated," he explained gently, "forced to fit in. Now we're discovering there are more of us, so many more. Raven can make herself look like an average human being out there, she might not want to have to here."

"But she said ..." Hank stared to say.

"I know," he interrupted in what he hoped was an understanding tone, "she's told me before, but we're all growing and changing. She might change her mind. I'm not asking you to stop, I know how much this means to you, but I'm just asking you to be gentle, okay?"

Hank frowned, but then slowly nodded, clearly thinking it over.

"Okay."

Charles smiled and patted the younger man on the back.

"Thank you," he said. "Right, I have to go and see if Alex has destroyed anymore of the bunker. How's the harness coming?"

"I should have it done by this afternoon."

Hank really had the most amazing mind.

"I'll see you then, then," Charles said and went to leave the room.

All in all things were going better. Of course the unresolved sexual tension between Angel and Darwin, and Angel and Alex was not something he had seen coming and gave him a headache when in too close proximity to the three for too long, but everything else was groovy.

~*~

Among all the preparing for confrontation, Charles did also manage to deal with personal things as well. The box arrived by courier a day after he confirmed the final details and he took it to his room immediately. The idea had come to him the first night with Erik and as soon as it had formed he had known he was going to go through with it. There was no other way he could think to equalise things. He did not want Erik shut off from him in any way, but it made their relationship unequal, at least until Erik learned greater control. Erik was always at the mercy of his powers, but he was not at the mercy of Erik's, not yet.

He had rushed the order through, paying far more than he had needed to, but this was important to him. The box was polished wood and he opened it and smiled at what was inside. Pulling the items inside from their velvet padding and admiring the workmanship, he set about his plan.

When he was done he walked downstairs like normal and went to help Alex in the bunker. He had every intention of allowing Erik to simply notice what he had done.

Lunch was always a chaotic affair with people running in and out, doing their own thing, but it was the first place Charles bumped into Erik since they had woken up and Erik had returned to his own room. So far they were keeping their relationship discrete, but Charles was pretty sure Raven suspected something.

"Hello, Erik," he said and smiled as he took the sandwich he had just made and headed off to find Hank.

Erik was with Angel, but clearly noticed something as Charles walked passed.

"What ..?" Erik turned and asked, but Charles just smiled at his lover and continued on his way.

He caught Erik watching him at several points during the day and after dinner he headed up to his room, counting down the minutes until Erik opened the door and invited himself in.

"Show me," Erik said.

Charles smiled, but did as he was asked and pulled up his sleeves and lifted one pant leg to illustrate. He had known Erik would sense the metal, but when Erik actually saw the cuffs he had had made, his lover's eyes became round and shocked. They were made of stainless steel, engraved with a simple scroll design and each was about an inch and a half wide. They fitted around his wrists and ankles perfectly, having been made specifically to his measurements and the edges were rolled to prevent them digging in.

As Erik just stared at him, Charles held up the other thing that had come in the box. The silver chain swung under his fingers and displayed the delicate key perfectly in the evening light.

[ _This is for you,_ ] he said, slipping into Erik's mind with the ease of someone who knew it intimately well. [ _The locks are breakable in an emergency, but not without destroying the cuffs and using a great deal of force. Only the key will open them._ ]

Erik was still staring at him and slowly the key floated from his fingers and into Erik's.

"You trust me this much?" Erik looked at the key as if it held the secret of life or something.

"I love you," Charles replied, liking how that sounded when he said it out loud for the first time. "Love requires equals to survive."

"I told you, I don't remember love," Erik said, sounding all but lost, "I only remember pain and hate."

[ _May I?_ ] Charles asked, brushing over Erik's mind.

Erik nodded, although the man still appeared completely dazed.

Charles remembered how he had helped Erik with his control in the other timeline and he reached into Erik's mind, seeking out what he knew had to be there. Beneath the fear and the anger he found the brightness he was seeking and he drew part of it forward.

[ _Love is still there,_ ] he said, seeing and feeling the memory he had found and brought into Erik's mind, [ _you just have to learn to find it._ ]

Erik's mother was there in Erik's mind and he could feel Erik's pain, but there was joy as well. He was not an idiot, he knew Erik was full of darkness; he had seen it all too clearly in the future that would no longer be, but there was more to his lover than that.

"Now we are equal," he said, standing and walking towards the other man, "each as vulnerable to the other, each as trusting. One day you won't need fancy toys like these, until then I give you them. I will give you everything you need, Erik, all you have to do is ask."

Reaching up, he wiped the single tear from Erik's cheek and then left his hand there.

"How are you real?" Erik asked him and he knew it was a perfectly honest question.

"I see minds, Erik," he replied quietly, "many, many minds; I understand far more about human nature than you could imagine. I have seen love like ours in other minds, but I've never felt it before, not before you. I can never let it go, not now I know. I am being perfectly selfish."

Erik laughed, just a small sound, but one that expressed confusion and doubt and need.

"You should run from me," Erik whispered to him, reaching up and fingering the metal around Charles' wrist.

"You're stuck with me I'm afraid, my friend, my lover," Charles whispered back.

He knew it was coming before Erik kissed him, because he was flooded with overwhelming want, but the kiss was not hard or brutal, it was soft and passionate and demanding. Charles simply surrendered to it and wound his arms around Erik.

[ _May I?_ ] Erik asked and it felt strange to be on the other side of the question.

[ _Of course,_ ] he replied and he felt his arms being pulled back.

To be at the mercy of Erik's power sent shots of excitement all through him. He began to move backwards without his conscious consent and he had no choice but to fall onto the bed when his knees connected with it. Of course he could have fought back, made it harder, but that wasn't what this was about. Erik had asked, he had said yes, so he was surrendering.

Erik lifted him onto the bed properly, flicking off his shoes for him by whatever metal was in them, and then proceeded to arrange him. His wrists stopped just above his head on either side and his legs parted, but not so there was any strain. He was still almost fully clothed and he refused to peek inside Erik's mind to find out what his lover had in mind.

When the zip on his trousers slid down and the metal button slid out of its hole he began to get the idea. So far in their nightly encounters they had explored each other with hands quite thoroughly and there had been lots of kissing and Erik had learned to exploit Charles' incredibly sensitive nipples, but they had not tried anything else. Charles was completely new to the reality of loving another man and of the encounters he had glimpsed in Erik's mind, none of them had involved tenderness of any sort. That made the relationship a very new thing for both of them.

"Just relax," Erik told him, climbing onto the bed as well, also still in his clothes.

It was hard for Charles to hold on to his desire to know as Erik totally failed to begin to strip either of them. What his lover did do was deftly reach into his open fly and underwear and pull out his rapidly hardening cock. Charles didn't even bother to try and stifle the gasp that that move drew out of him.

"I'm going to taste you, Charles," Erik told him, voice low and husky in a way that made Charles' cock twitch with appreciation, "and then I'm going to use my mouth to make you writhe against your bonds. Your job is to try not to scream loud enough to alert the whole house."

"Bloody hell, you're trying to kill me," was about the only response Charles could come up with to that, especially when Erik set about doing what had just been described.

Charles had control of his motor functions for what seemed like an inordinately short time after that. As Erik's shockingly talented tongue did things to the tip of his cock and, when liberal amounts of suction were applied, he thoroughly lost it. Erik played him as if he was a fine instrument and he writhed just as predicted and had to bite his lip hard not to shout rather too loudly.

Despite the number of girls he had managed to pick up in Oxford pubs, he had only ever had two blow jobs in his life and Erik completely blew both of those away. Somehow the fact they both still had their clothes on made it all the more intimate and being held down was driving him completely crazy. He hadn't actually considered that being at Erik's mercy would turn him on quite so completely, but then he was discovering new things about himself daily.

[ _Please,_ ] he begged when he was so aroused he thought he might explode.

[ _How can I refuse when you ask so nicely?_ ] Erik replied in kind without so much as pausing in what he was doing.

Charles swore loudly when Erik sucked him hard and then swallowed him to a degree that he was pretty sure should have been physically impossible. He had seen plenty of erotic things in real life and in other peoples' heads in his time, but the sight of Erik sucking on his cock had to be the most incredible. He came so hard that for a while he saw stars and he could only breathe in ragged pants.

Then Erik turned his nerves to rivulets of pure electricity by sucking on him until he was completely spent, apparently relishing every moment. Charles was pretty sure he had died and was in paradise as Erik finally pulled off and smiled at him. He was boneless and wrecked and felt utterly amazing, and he couldn't have put two words together if his life had depended on it.

"I have been wondering how to render you completely speechless," Erik said, radiating pleasure and slowly kneeling up.

"Nghh," was the only reply Charles could come up with.

~*~

Everyone was sat round the large dining room table, but not for a meal. It was time to decide how to proceed.

"Right," Charles said as everyone settled in, "what you all know is that we are after Sebastian Shaw, what most of you don't know is exactly why."

They had decided to leave the explanation until after the younger mutants had perfected some of their powers. After a week and a half everyone's progress had been staggering. Even though Charles had seen it happen in the other timeline, he was still amazed at the reality.

"Shaw is completely insane," Erik said when Charles looked at him; "he wishes to start a nuclear war and wipe out humanity."

"But that would wipe out most mutants as well," Hank pointed out almost instantly, "few mutations will protect against that level of radiation."

"Like Erik said, Shaw is insane," Charles agreed; "he believes nuclear power created us and that it will not destroy us."

He had been inside the man's mind and was all too aware of the madman's psychoses.

"But how can he start a war that big?" Alex asked.

"By convincing the Russians to place missiles in Cuba and running a US blockade," he replied, "but we're not going to let it get that far."

"How?" Sean asked.

"Yes, Charles, how?" Erik said and gave him one of those slightly patronising looks.

"Well I think our first port of call should be Emma Frost," he replied, "Shaw's telepath."

No one contradicted him immediately which was nice.

"Go on," Erik said.

"I can use Cerebro to contact her," he explained. "She's not an idiot, she has to know Shaw is completely unstable and with an alternative option she may chose to change sides. Even if she doesn't, once contact is made we will have a location."

"But we don't have Cerebro," Raven pointed out.

"It's back at the base," Hank added as if he thought maybe Charles had forgotten.

Charles smiled and nodded.

"Yes, but we walked out perfectly easily, I don't see why we can't sneak back in and borrow the facilities," he said, playing with his pen as he spoke. "Between us, Erik and I can get us in and once we are in the dome no one has to know we are there. It's not as if they will be expecting us to come back."

[ _Mental, completely mental,_ ] came so loudly from Sean's direction that Charles was pretty sure he would have heard it from the next room.

"Can you pinpoint every member of personnel in the base before we go in?" Erik asked, an eminently practical question of course.

"Yes," he replied.

"Can you divert or disable anyone we come across so they are never aware we have even been there?"

"Yes."

"Then it's feasible," Erik said with a nod, which kind of shocked Charles; he had expected more resistance.

"Anyone else have any objections?" he asked, but everyone shook their heads. "Right, then I suggest we prepare for tomorrow night."

There were a few nervous looks between the younger mutants, but no one disagreed. Nervousness hung in the air as everyone dispersed, but it was tinged with excitement.

"Charles," Raven caught up with him as he was leaving the room.

"Yes?" he asked, pulling his mind back from thinking about his coming discussion with Emma Frost.

Raven took hold of his wrist and lifted it, pushing back the sleeve.

"What's this?"

He had known someone would spot one of the cuffs sooner or later, since he was wearing them most of the time.

"Just something Erik and I are working on," he replied with what he hoped was a convincing smile.

"Then why are you wearing them now?" Raven asked. "I saw you had something on at breakfast."

"Time," he lied smoothly, even though he hated doing it, "everyone's so busy preparing Erik and I are never sure when we'll get time to practice. We're thinking something like these might be useful in dangerous situation, but we're not sure yet so we're using me as a guinea pig."

Raven looked sceptical.

"You're letting Erik throw you around aren't you," she said and he had to concentrate very hard on not blushing.

"Something like that," he managed to say with a perfectly straight face.

"Just be careful," Raven told him, "I don't want to have to remove his spleen if he hurts you."

The idea of Raven going up against Erik made him smile, talk about beauty and the beast. It helped that he wasn't sure who would win.

~*~

It really was pathetically easy to break back into the top secret CIA base and it did make Charles wonder if there was any facility in the world they couldn't just walk into if they so chose. He distracted and diverted any personnel while Erik opened locked doors and Hank dealt with any hi-tech barriers. The others were mostly along in case everything went pear shaped.

Cerebro was there waiting for them and once Hank had disabled any outside indicators on the dome, they fired the computer up. Standing there with the headset on, waiting for Hank to finish preparations, Charles prayed that Emma Frost would see sense. It would be far easier to deal with Shaw if there were no other mutants in the way.

"Ready when you are," Hank said and snapped him to attention.

"Do it," he replied.

Charles closed his eyes and waited for the shock to his system that always came when Hank started Cerebro. This time he refused to let himself fall into the chaos that always came at first; he was only after one mutant not just flitting from random contact to random contact. For a few moments he remained perfectly still on the psychic level, allowing his perception to adjust and then he began to reach out.

After the first few minutes he completely lost track of time, simply following instincts that he still didn't quite understand. His advantage was that he had been inside Emma's mind in the other timeline so he knew what he was looking for. It took a great deal of concentration, but eventually he found her and her tightly guarded mind.

[ _Miss Frost,_ ] he projected as he very gently skimmed her mental presence, [ _I was wondering if we could have a quiet word?_ ]

What he felt instantly was shock. He had done the telepathic equivalent of sneaking up behind her and then tapping her on the shoulder, so he wasn't overly surprised.

[ _Please,_ ] he added as he felt her reach for her diamond form.

That one word was apparently the right thing to say because Emma did not vanish from his perception.

[ _Telepath, how do you know my name?_ ]

It almost felt like an attack as the words came back like diamond edged blades, but then he assumed she was demonstrating her strength.

[ _When we met the other night I picked a few things up, Charles Xavier, pleased to meet you again._ ]

He wasn't about to tell her that most of the information didn't come from the current reality.

[ _I don't like snoopers in my head._ ]

[ _Yes, well, I didn't actually know you were going to be there, so please forgive the intrusion._ ]

The fact she didn't know quite how to take him made him smile; Emma had obviously never expected him to be civil.

[ _What do you want?_ ] she asked.

[ _I'd like to talk to you about ideologies and a possible alliance,_ ] he explained and he knew she would know he was being perfectly serious.

[ _You wish to speak to my employer?_ ] immediately came back.

[ _No, Miss Frost,_ ] he replied, [ _I wish to speak with you. How can I put this, your employer is, shall we say, a complete bloody nutcase._ ]

The fact that Emma was partially amused by that was a good sign.

[ _I believe this conversation is over,_ ] she said and he had the distinct impression she thought he was a ridiculous amateur.

[ _Please, Miss Frost,_ ] he said before she could cut him off, [ _how can you lose by speaking with me? If I am the imbecile you seem to believe you may learn useful information._ ]

[ _And if you are not you may attempt to do the same,_ ] Emma pointed out.

[ _You have my word I will not attempt to pry into your mind, Miss Frost,_ ] he told her solemnly, [ _if I had wanted to do that I would have done so when I surprised you. Your mind is strong, but I have a few tricks of my own._ ]

[ _How are you even reaching me?_ ] That at least was a genuine question.

[ _A machine,_ ] he revealed, [ _it is extending my range. It took me quite a while to find you._ ]

[ _A CIA machine?_ ]

[ _Technically, yes,_ ] he replied, [ _although I have recently changed my status to self-employed; it seemed more prudent. That's part of what I wished to speak to you about._ ]

[ _I didn't think they just let you leave the CIA._ ]

[ _Yes well, it wasn't as if I asked, a few friends and I simply left and didn't provide a forwarding address._ ]

[ _So you're on the run and..._ ]

[ _You misunderstand me, Miss Frost,_ ] he interrupted her, [ _we are far from refugees, we are simply independent. We would like to be independent and united._ ]

He felt her mental laugh as distinctly as if she was standing next to him.

[ _You are asking me to join you?_ ] Emma sounded incredulous. [ _What could you possibly offer me?_ ]

[ _I may not own a submarine, Miss Frost,_ ] he told her, [ _but I can offer a place of safety and a future. A nuclear war will destroy most of us as well, not just the humans, and a half dead planet cannot sustain life, not even mutant life._ ]

[ _How did you know ..?_ ] Emma stopped herself from saying more.

[ _How do I know Shaw's plans?_ ] Charles sent back. [ _That would take far too long to explain, but suffice to say I know all about Cuba. But back to the point, somewhere along the way Sebastian Shaw or should I say, Herr Doktor Schmidt, has lost his mind. He believes in a possible future based on pure fallacy. The nuclear winter would destroy the planet and the radiation would create mutations of the horrific kind, not of our kind. Humanity is evolving, but attempting to speed it up with a nuclear blast will result in extinction._ ]

[ _Just words..._ ]

[ _Science actually, I am a professor of genetics, Miss Frost. The CIA didn't come to me originally because they knew I was a mutant, they came to me because of my knowledge and one of them had seen you. I was an idealistic idiot at the time, but have since seen the error of my ways and would very much like to not end up in an open war that we cannot win._ ]

[ _We are far stronger than them,_ ] Emma protested.

[ _And far too few,_ ] he replied. [ _You are a highly intelligent young woman, Miss Frost, the sums just do not add up. All that will come of war is pain and all that will come of us being divided is conflict that we do not need. You may share Sebastian Shaw's ideals, but you do not share his psychosis. With your help we can bring this madness to an end before the humans ever need to know how close they came or how powerful we really are._ ]

[ _You have nothing to offer me._ ]

[ _Stability, a home, others like yourself, safety, do none of those sound appealing? I will leave you to think about it, Miss Frost. If you are willing to speak further allow me to contact you at the same time tomorrow night. If not, then it has been a pleasure conversing with another like myself and we shall see each other on the battlefield. I am sorry to say I will not be so gentle if it comes to that._ ]

He withdrew before she could object or reply; it was always a good idea to let people think things over.

"Well?" Erik asked as soon as he opened his eyes.

"She is thinking about it," he replied and pushed the sensors away from his head. "We will contact her again tomorrow for her answer."

He turned to Hank.

"Did the coordinates come through okay?"

"Perfectly."

"Then if she says no, tomorrow we will have to use them," he concluded and stepped off of the platform.

With Emma Frost's help their campaign would be far easier, but without it could work as well.

~*~

"Frost may attempt to attack you," Erik pointed out after they had returned to the mansion.

"And I'm prepared for that," Charles replied and smiled as Erik automatically followed him into his room. "I may still be idealistic in many ways, but I am not stupid."

Erik's expression said the man disagreed.

"If she hurts you, I will hurt her."

That made Charles smile even more; Erik's protectiveness was kind of sweet, also homicidal and a little creepy, but Charles liked it. He had always looked after himself and in turn Raven, because she was like his little sister, it was new and exciting to have someone trying to look after him.

"Thank you," he said, because he appreciated the sentiment.

He decided that maybe it was time to broach a subject that had been on his mind since the whole mind shattering blowjob incident. Unfortunately he began to flush just thinking about it.

"Charles, why are you blushing?" Of course Erik noticed.

"Well," he said, trying to make himself just say it, "that is I was wondering, if maybe, you might consider ..."

Erik was just looking confused and Charles shook himself; he was very bad about talking about sex. Partaking of sex he could handle, talking about it, not so much.

"Would you care to engage in intercourse?" he asked and it sounded so formal and stilted that he was pretty sure he would put Erik off right off the bat.

The way Erik looked at him he felt an idiot and blushed even more.

"I've never done it, but I am aware of the mechanics given that I went to Oxford with a large number of English Public school boys totally unaware there was a telepath among them," he hurried on. "I do have what we might need, but I also understand if you would rather no..."

He was silenced by Erik kissing him hard enough to bruise.

[ _Shall I take that as a yes?_ ] he asked in relief as Erik pulled him very close and used one hand to grab a large handful of his arse.

Erik smiled against his mouth, clearly amused at his stumbling, but the erection pushing against his thigh spoke of considerable arousal as well.

[ _I would love to engage in intercourse, Professor,_ ] Erik told him, teasing him very directly.

[ _Then I think, Mr Lehnsherr,_ ] he replied in kind, [ _we are wearing too many clothes._ ]

Taking that as an invitation, Erik started to undress him. He had picked up the pure delight that Erik seemed to feel on peeling him out of his multiple layers, so he never tried to do it himself. It had not taken Erik long to become more efficient at it than he was himself, even with the tendency Erik had to stop and just touch him every now and then.

He did manage to get Erik's belt and fly undone before he was completely stripped, but the turtlenecks always defeated him, so he let Erik do that himself. By the time they were done there were clothes all over the place, but Charles didn't care in the slightest as Erik pushed him down on the bed. This he had become very good at and for a while they just played their usual game of touching and kissing as they both sank into the mood.

It was only when Erik pushed up onto those strong arms so that his lover was looking down at him that Charles knew they were about to move on.

"So," Erik said, looking at him hungrily, "do you wish to give or receive?"

Charles felt his stomach flip, he hadn't really expected to be asked, he had just assumed that Erik with his prior experience would be in charge.

"Receive," he said and watched Erik's eyes dilate with pure arousal; that had definitely been the right thing to say.

"Where is the ..?" He pointed at the dresser before Erik could finish asking.

He had placed the pot of Vaseline in his top drawer two days previously just in case; he was always an optimist.

"Lie down on your front," Erik told him, as his lover climbed off the bed to retrieve what they needed, "it will be easier to begin with."

Licking his lips, Charles did as he was asked and then waited for Erik to return to the bed. He was suddenly incredibly nervous. When the bed springs dipped again, he couldn't even bring himself to look round and just allowed Erik to gently spread his legs.

He had honestly never felt so open and vulnerable as Erik knelt half between his spread thighs and massaged his buttocks. He was all too aware that men did this all the time, he hadn't been kidding about Oxford, but it felt so incredibly intimate and just a little wrong.

"Relax and stop thinking, Charles," Erik told him, "I can feel you from here. All you have to concentrate on is telling me if anything is too much or it hurts."

He mumbled his reply into the pillow, but even he wasn't sure what he had been trying to say, so it made no sense. He was sure he was blushing all over, but he did his best to do as Erik told him. He wanted this, he had asked for this and even though he felt acute embarrassment at Erik touching him there, he was going to see it through. He only hoped that Erik didn't notice the fact his cock was beginning to deflate with the pure mortification he was feeling.

When Erik spread his arse cheeks, he pushed his head into the pillow and tried not to die of embarrassment and then a lubricated finger swiped over his hole. Suddenly he wasn't so much embarrassed as conflicted and quickly heading back to aroused. So many nerves fired at the same time he moaned quietly.

"I think you may be getting the idea," Erik said and stroked his arse again.

He still felt incredibly exposed, but as Erik touched him it was beginning to make Charles excited rather than ashamed and nervous. Seeing flashes of what other people were doing was nothing to being part of the actual event and he found that some of his muscles were actually trembling with excitement. He and Erik had been intimate since they had come to the mansion, but this was taking it to a much higher level.

Erik was treating him very gently, upping the pressure only very slowly and when Erik finally pushed a finger into him his muscles just opened as if they were meant for it. Not that that stopped him gasping and shifting and Erik stopped moving instantly.

"Charles, are you alright?" Erik asked in a very serious tone.

He only managed a hum in reply.

"Charles?" Erik repeated, clearly very serious about having his consent.

"Yes," he replied, "don't stop."

It was a very strange feeling, but an incredibly arousing one as well, especially when Erik began to move his finger again.

He doubted very much that anyone had been this gentle with Erik, but his lover seemed determined to make sure everything was perfect for him. In fact Erik's attention to detail was a little bit agonising in places, because Erik slowly opened him, slowly being the word and Charles found that his cock was so incredibly hard it actually ached. He was a little bit awed by how easily his body opened up to Erik's fingers if he was truthful. He knew it was possible of course, but knowing and doing were two entirely different experiences.

After the second finger he entirely gave up trying to control himself and moaned quite loudly. If anyone happened to be walking past his door and heard him it was their own lookout.

"My god, Charles," Erik said, the first words he had uttered in quite a while, "you are beautiful like this."

That just made Charles moan some more and push back on the three fingers embedded deep in his arse.

"Want you, please, now," he said, needing the next level of intimacy like he needed air.

The loss of Erik's fingers made him feel empty and wanting, but as Erik urged him onto his hands and knees he knew it wouldn't be long before he had what he wanted. The pot of Vaseline fell back to the bed momentarily and then Erik moved in close behind him.

The first push of Erik's cock into his body was a bit of a shock, but he grunted and willed his muscles to relax. The fact that Erik stilled as soon as he made a sound was actually worse.

"Move dammit," he just about managed to say coherently and almost took matters into his own hands.

"Patience," Erik told him, holding his hips firmly and slowly beginning to push in again, "I do not want to hurt you."

"You're not," he promised, but the last word dissolved into a long moan as Erik filled him.

He had never imagined quite what it would feel like. It was not just the physical sensation that was utterly encompassing, it was the knowledge of what he was doing and who he was doing it with. This was the closest two human men could come and even as he registered that thought he felt his mind trying to bridge the gap as well. He was overcome with the desire to share every part of himself and he had to claw on to his self control as Erik began to move inside of him.

Erik's strong hands on his body, Erik's cock going deep into the heart of him, Erik's mind floating at the edges of his consciousness; it was all hypnotising. His usual awareness of his immediate vicinity faded away as Erik took everything he was offering. It was honestly better than he had ever dreamed and he gave himself up to it completely.

His arousal built and built, becoming a tight knot in his loins and he felt Erik's need and desire worming its way under his skin as well. He felt ready to explode in all ways and he knew he couldn't control it for long.

"Erik," he panted, trying to give some warning, "can't ... need ..."

"Give in," was all Erik said in return and Charles had no choice but to do just that.

As his body and mind exploded at the same time, the most he could do was focus solely on Erik, opening himself up completely and sharing everything. This was not something he wanted to accidentally project into anyone else's dreams and so he concentrated completely on Erik.

Everything turned into a haze of emotion and orgasm and he lost track of his own body somewhere, feeling everything that was going through them both. He refused to let go completely, keeping it all to just them, but that meant all his barriers between himself and Erik were worth nothing. For a while they were one being, sharing every sensation, every base thought, until finally Charles managed to drag his awareness back towards himself.

Separating himself from Erik mentally was almost as uncomfortable as Erik carefully pulling out of his body. He was a telepath, at a fundamental level he wanted to share other minds and be shared in return and it took a great deal of effort to convince his brain to follow his instructions.

As Erik pulled him onto his side, spooning up behind him, he felt slightly sore in mind and body and he couldn't help smiling. Never with any other person had he felt the need to be one quite so completely. It could have been the fact that Erik was a mutant or it could just have been Erik, he didn't know and he couldn't bring himself to care.

"That was amazing," he said quietly when he could finally speak again.

Erik ran a hand down his side and kissed him lightly on the neck.

[ _Yes,_ ] was the silent reply.

Charles registered that he felt sticky and sweaty, but as Erik pulled the cover up over them both he didn't object. He had no wish to break what was left of their connection by moving and he wasn't overly sure his legs would hold him yet anyway. Lying against Erik he let his eyes drift close and floated free of all care for a while.

~*~

[ _Good evening, Miss Frost,_ ] he said as he initiated contact the next night.

[ _What did you have in mind?_ ] The question was cold and did not give away any information from Emma's end.

[ _Straight to business then,_ ] he replied. [ _You are a very direct woman, Miss Frost._ ]

[ _And you are procrastinating, Xavier,_ ] Emma replied.

[ _We were hoping that with your assistance we could resolve this without too much destruction,_ ] he told her. [ _Of course exactly how would have to be decided with your assistance._ ]

[ _That's your entire plan?_ ]

[ _We are very flexible,_ ] he replied, [ _and very capable._ ]

[ _A fanatic, an amateur G-man and a handful of untrained mutants,_ ] Emma shot back. [ _You are not even a threat._ ]

[ _If you believe that, Miss Frost, why are you even talking to me?_ ]

Nothing came back over their connection for a while and he knew he had asked the right question.

[ _You said the blast would kill mutants as well as humans._ ]

[ _It will destroy just about everything in its path,_ ] Charles replied; [ _I can show you the statistics if you wish. I have a colleague who is very good at facts and figures. Shaw has a rather unique relationship with energy and he has forgotten we are not all so protected. Have you never suspected he is not sane?_ ]

Again there was silence and Charles was pretty sure he had hit a nerve.

[ _What happens if we help you?_ ]

His heart almost skipped a beat when she said 'we'; it made it clear she had spoken to Shaw's other mutants.

[ _You would be welcome to join us or go your own way, I am sure Shaw's wealth could keep you in the manner to which you have become accustomed._ ]

He did not do her the disservice or asking if she could get to it.

[ _You would just let us leave?_ ]

[ _Of course, Miss Frost,_ ] he replied, [ _we do not wish to force anybody into servitude. If at a later date we were to come into conflict I cannot guarantee the outcome, but the future is forever changing. Our aim is to stop Shaw, what comes after that is up for discussion._ ]

[ _How solid is your base of operations?_ ]

An interesting question, but Charles could understand it. Rather than replying in words he sent her some mental images of the inside of the mansion. He showed her nothing that would give away their location, but enough to make his point.

[ _You weren't kidding when you said you weren't homeless,_ ] Emma replied and sounded surprised.

[ _There are many things you do not know about me,_ ] he said, enjoying the ominous quality of his words; he thought Erik would be proud of him.

For a while he was left to his own thoughts and he allowed Emma her privacy.

[ _Shaw takes an hour a day to recharge in the reactor,_ ] was what finally came back and Charles mentally cheered inside his own head. [ _He is totally cut off while he does._ ]

[ _That certainly sounds like a window of opportunity, Miss Frost,_ ] he replied, making sure his mental voice was calm.

Things were beginning to fall into place and they began to talk strategy.


	3. The End of the Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See ch 1

Stealing the blackbird was child's play, because Charles just made most of the personnel forget they were supposed to have a top secret plane in the hanger in the first place. Then they were on their way to the Baltic.

"Yellow," Alex said over the headset as they all made themselves as comfortable as possible, "I can't believe you actually went for yellow, Hank."

"I like it," Raven added and smiled sweetly.

"Exactly," Alex responded, apparently believing that made his point.

"Don't upset the guy flying the plane," Sean pointed out very sensibly and Charles couldn't help smiling.

If felt so much like the time he remembered, but so different as well and he allowed himself the luxury of feeling the hum of the other minds around him. The big difference from last time of course was that Angel and Darwin were with them and it felt much more complete.

Angel was in the co-pilot seat Moira had taken before, having been trained up by Hank in a very short space of time. As it turned out flying seemed to be her thing, whether it was with wings or a plane.

"Right," Charles said, deciding to head off any possible argument, "I think we can leave the discussion about the uniforms until we get back. Hank how long to target?"

"Four hours ten minutes," was the prompt response.

"I know it's probably impossible," he said, looking at the adrenaline flushed faces around him, "but it might be an idea to try and rest on the journey. I'm all too aware none of us got much sleep last night."

The nervous excitement in the house had kept him awake most of the night. Erik had eventually distracted him with sex to stop him pacing the bedroom, after which he had actually managed some sleep, but not a whole lot. The way Erik smiled at him from across the plane he was pretty sure he knew which part of the night his lover was thinking about.

"If anyone wants some help, I can give you a mental suggestion to drop off," he offered.

Everyone looked at everyone else.

"Actually, that might be a good idea, Professor," Sean said, showing much more maturity than his years suggested. "What should I do?"

"Get comfortable," he replied and touched his temple with his fingers while looking past Raven to where Sean was sitting.

Sean shifted in his seat and closed his eyes.

"No fancy flying, Hank," Sean said as he relaxed and then Charles slipped gently into the young mutant's mind.

Placing a light suggestion there he carefully urged Sean's mind to shut down and watched as Sean slowly slipped into sleep.

"Um, that kind of looks like a good plan," Darwin decided shortly after Sean relaxed completely.

It took Charles ten minutes to put everyone out except him, Erik, Angel and Hank as one by one the others decided to skip the journey. Then he was left looking at Erik all the way across the other side of the plane, unable to touch and it was a royal pain.

[ _The children are going to figure out exactly what we're doing if you keep looking at me like that,_ ] Erik thought directly at him.

[ _I can't help it,_ ] he replied, [ _that suit has me thinking all sorts of wicked thoughts._ ]

[ _Given how many layers you usually wear, I think I am in the more difficult position,_ ] Erik replied, without batting an eyelid.

[ _So you like me in leather then?_ ]

Erik made a sound that had Angel turning to look at them.

"I suggested Erik might like to sleep as well," Charles said, hoping that he was covering his reaction to the sound better than he was in his head, "he doesn't seem to agree."

The expression on Angel's face said she didn't quite believe him, but she didn't comment.

[ _Come into my head, Charles,_ ] Erik sent to him, [ _we can discuss it._ ]

A plane was so not the place for it, but Charles was defenceless and he lifted his fingers to his head again. Slipping into Erik's mind was incredibly easy and he didn't step out again until Hank's voice came over the radio and informed him they were then minutes from target.

Charles woke everyone and then reached out his mind to find Emma Frost.

[ _You're late, he's been in there twenty five minutes already,_ ] was what came back in lieu of a greeting.

[ _Weather,_ ] he replied, although he was just guessing. [ _Are you ready?_ ]

[ _Just give us the coordinates,_ ] Emma replied.

"Hank, position please," he said quickly and Hank immediately rattled of a set of numbers which he relayed to Emma.

Ten seconds later as they were all releasing themselves from their harnesses Azazel and Emma appeared in the centre of the plane.

"Good afternoon, Miss Frost," Charles greeted, now that everyone else could see their guests as well.

"Just so you know," Emma said, looking him directly in the eye, "if you fail, I will tell Shaw you took us all out with a psychic blast."

"Fair enough," he replied, although Erik did not look impressed, "but we are not going to fail. Just so you know, if you double cross us, Hank will blow your submarine into tiny little pieces. Shall we?"

Everyone in the main body of the aircraft joined hands and then Charles reached out to Emma. Her grip was surprisingly firm as she wrapped her fingers around his and then she nodded at Azazel. The blackbird vanished around them and the main control room of the brightly lit sub appeared.

Charles blinked as black spots jumped in his vision; travelling with Azazel was very peculiar.

"You look like someone just hit you over the head with something heavy," Raven said in a whisper.

"I think my mind is still catching up," he replied and looked around.

The interior of the sub was the same as he remembered it, just much neater. Putting his fingers to his forehead he sent Hank the all clear.

"Through there," he said and pointed at the door to Shaw's cabin.

"How did you know that?" Emma demanded, since there were two doors in the main control room.

"Oh," he said with a smile, "I've been here before. The reactor room is behind the end wall. How do we open it from this side?" he asked, looking at Emma.

She seemed disconcerted, which was exactly how he wanted her, because that meant she was less likely to stab them in the back at the first sign of trouble.

"Switch in the metal box on the desk."

"Everyone remember their job?"

He looked at Sean first, who nodded, then at Darwin, Alex, and Raven. Hopefully with the show of force Shaw would just give up, but the others would be good backup if the man decided to fight.

[ _Remember, Lover,_ ] he sent at Erik, [ _I will help you anyway I can, all you have to do is tell me._ ]

Erik did not reply, but led the way into the next room. Charles waked up beside his friend and saw the box Emma had mentioned flip open under Erik's command. He looked at everyone and then nodded at Erik. They were ready and Erik pushed the switch without so much as glancing at it. Charles was impressed with the way the wall just neatly slid open and then he saw Shaw for the first time in close quarters.

Sean opened his mouth the moment Shaw looked up and every mirror in the room beyond shattered under the onslaught. That was their cue to move and as a group they charged into the reactor room.

"Erik," Shaw said, seemingly unbothered, "your brought friends."

"None of us are your friends," Erik all but growled.

Charles could feel Erik's hatred boiling for the surface and it was a wild and uncontrolled thing. Shaw appeared completely relaxed and smiled at Erik's reaction, sneering dismissively and Charles wished he knew what was going on in the man's head. The damn helmet made him completely useless and all he could do was stand there.

"Which one's the telepath?" Shaw asked in a conversational tone.

At that moment Charles wished he had a better poker face because he must have twitched since Shaw's eyes pinned him down instantly.

"Ah, you're much less impressive in person; Emma was quite impressed," Shaw told him. "Of course I know not to judge on physical appearance alone."

"Shut up," Erik all but growled.

"Now, now, Erik," Shaw said and held up a hand, "is that any way to talk to your creator?"

Charles saw the cable that Erik was levitating behind Shaw dip as his friend lost focus.

[ _Remove the helmet and tell me what you want,_ ] Charles sent at him. [ _Between rage and serenity, Erik, between rage and serenity._ ]

One of the beams from the ceiling shuddered above them and everyone looked up nervously. They were still underwater, structural damage would be bad and Erik was losing control. Shaw's smile just grew.

"Why are we fighting?" Shaw asked, looking around at all of them. "We should all be on the same side, we are the same kind."

Erik was one tense knot of fury next to him and Charles put his fingers to his temple; he had to do something.

[ _Erik, I love you,_ ] he told his lover and sent every warm feeling he could drag up with it. [ _The helmet._ ]

Erik stiffened and gasped, but the cable whipped out like a striking cobra and ripped the helmet off. In the split second where it was half off Shaw's head the other mutant realised what was happening and lifted his hand, looking straight at Charles. The next instant Charles knew that Shaw saw him as the only real threat and the man's hand glowed with pure energy. He invaded the man's mind, forcing all Shaw's muscles to freeze, but he also knew it was too late.

Shaw's power lanced towards him and to his shock, Darwin stepped into the path. Darwin adapted instantly, unfortunately not in any way the young mutant seemed to expect. Darwin became a conduit of sorts and Charles had no such defence. As the energy ripped through Darwin it came straight at him and he didn't even have time to try and move out of the way. He wasn't sure what he expected, maybe instant vaporisation, but mainly what it caused was pain.

For a moment he thought he could actually feel his cells trying to explode and he was falling. He could distantly hear Erik's voice shouting for him, both mentally and physically, but his mind seemed to be disconnecting from his body. The pain dimmed and everything seemed far away and dreamlike as all he could do was stare straight ahead.

He felt his hold on Shaw disintegrating and he knew he could not let go. Shaw was still far too dangerous; the man could easily kill every person in the room. As he sensed his grip on reality slipping he had no choice; he did the only thing he could and turned the full force of his mind on the other mutant.

He barely registered hitting the floor as his mind spiralled away from consciousness. There were hands on him, but it was only a vague sensation and slowly the world just went away. The last thing he saw was Erik's frantic face looking down at him and he wished he could touch his lover's mind one more time.

~*~

Waking up was kind of shocking, Charles had been almost positive he had been dying. When he first opened his eyes he didn't realise it because everything was black, but slowly things began to make sense and he could see the world as all sorts of neon edges. He blinked hard again, and finally the real world seemed to fade in and he recognised his room at the mansion.

There was an I.V. set up by the bed and what he recognised as Hank's equipment, but what drew most of his attention was the figure slumped in a nearby arm chair. Eric had a book in his lap where it had clearly fallen and he was snoring very quietly, which made Charles smile in what he was sure was a very silly way.

Alive, at home and with those he loved; he felt strangely content. Of course that didn't explain how he had come to be there or, for that matter, how Hank had managed to keep him alive. He lifted his hand slowly and put it to his temple, letting him mind flow over the mansion to see if he could figure out where everyone was, but the moment he did the presence of their little family seemed to dagger into his brain. If felt like when he had first begun to use Cerebro, before he had learned to regulate the initial contact and he groaned, putting both his hands to his head.

"Charles."

Erik was by his side in a second.

"Are you in pain?"

Charles would have replied, but his mind was still spinning too much for him to form words, so he did his best to look at Erik instead. The world flashed black again, turning Erik's face into harsh lines and he had to blink and force his vision to work properly.

"My god, your eyes," Erik said, voice touched with awe.

"What, what about my..?" It was so hard to get the words out.

"For a moment," Erik said, understanding him anyway, "for a moment they were like looking into blue flame."

The memory of blue flame streaking towards him thought Darwin jumped unbidden into Charles' mind. He could not imagine what it had done to him.

"How ... did you ... save me?" He wanted to ask so much more, but he didn't have the strength for it.

Erik gently brushed the hair away from his face for him.

"We didn't, it's a miracle you're alive," his lover told him in, for what was for Erik, an incredibly gentle tone; "Hank thinks Darwin transformed Shaw's energy burst somehow and then you were able to contain it."

That made a vague kind of sense to Charles. Of course that begged the question what would that much energy have done to him and it was as this idea flicked through his mind that he caught sight of his wrist where his pyjama sleeve had slipped down. For a few seconds all he could do was stare.

"What ..?" He didn't quite know how to express what he was feeling.

Where he usually wore one of his steel cuffs there was metallic grey something, only it wasn't the band, at least not as it had been. Around the edges it looked as if it had melted and fused with his skin and the scroll work looked more like scales than decoration, but the most remarkable thing was when he flexed his wrist, it moved as if it was his own flesh.

"Hank can't explain it," Erik said quietly, "but they're still metal, I can feel that, only they're part of you as well. It was as if you absorbed them."

Charles just stared, bringing his other wrist into easy line of sight.

"All four?" he asked, even though it seemed like a particularly stupid question after he spoke.

Erik nodded.

"When we realised what was happening we managed to get everything else metal off you, but the cuffs were already changing."

If he had had the strength, he would have laughed, because he would have had zippers in very strange places. He couldn't take his eyes off his wrists though, at least for the few more seconds he had the strength to hold them up that was. He had always been different, but he had never looked different. Now he did, even though it was a relatively minor way and he found it was quite a mental adjustment.

"Anything else?" he asked, not sure he really wanted to know.

"Your hair," Erik said and if he had been able, Charles would have moved to check his head.

"What about my hair?" he demanded, although it wasn't really very loud.

Erik didn't say anything for a moment, but Charles saw just a twitch of a smile.

"You have a very attractive electric blue streak, just here," Erik said and helpfully pulled a strand forward for him so he could see it.

Given his wrists and apparently, sometimes, his eyes, it seemed utterly trivial and this time he couldn't stop the laugh. Of course he regretted it instantly as his body objected and he coughed, shaking his whole frame.

"You idiot," Erik said, but very quickly helped him sit up slightly and pressed a glass of water to his lips.

[ _You were the one that made me laugh,_ ] he projected at Erik and Erik almost dropped the glass.

"No need to shout," Erik said, regaining composure quickly enough.

Charles frowned, but drank the water as Erik helped him; it had only been meant to be the lightest brush of minds.

"How long?" he asked as Erik helped him lay back onto pillows that had miraculously stacked themselves behind him. Finally buying pillow cases with small metal studs in the corners was paying off.

"Six days," Erik replied, checking him over like a bit of a mother hen; "it's four o'clock on Thursday."

It was hard for Charles to imagine what could have laid him up for six whole days.

"And everyone else is okay?" he asked, because it was easier to focus on that rather than himself.

"You mean you haven't already checked?"

"I tried, but it was all too loud, I think I may be a bit over sensitive at the moment."

Erik looked as if he was going to question that, but then just nodded.

"Everyone is fine and we have three extra guests," Erik told him. "I think Emma may take well to teaching."

That was possibly even more shocking than his wrists.

"We're talking about the same Emma," he said, just to make sure, "blond telepath with a fondness for rendering herself transparent?"

For the first time Erik smiled properly.

"She and Raven seem to get on particularly well," Erik told him.

"I think I might try out the coma for a little longer," he joked back.

"Don't you dare," his lover said and mock glared at him, "I am not cut out to look after teenagers and delinquents; that's your job. Now, don't attempt to do anything while I summon Hank. He will want to have a look at you."

"Yes, sir," he said and did his best to mock salute, but his arms felt ridiculously heavy so he only managed it about half way.

Luckily, or perhaps unluckily given Hank's peevishness when he finally woke up a second time, he managed to fall asleep before their resident genius actually arrived.

~*~

It became abundantly clear very quickly that no matter what he wanted, Charles was able to stay awake for short periods, but needed to sleep in between, especially if he remotely tried to use his powers. After the third repeat of this he accepted it and the fourth time he woke up he at least felt a little more alert. He was also incredibly pleased to see Raven perched on the edge of Erik's chair, talking to the man quietly.

"You two look very cosy," he said and smiled as soon as they looked up.

"Charles," Raven said, bouncing to her feet and over to him very quickly, "never worry me like that again."

Then she kissed him on the forehead and made him smile again.

"I will do my best," he promised, although he was well aware it might be difficult to keep. "I like the short shorts."

It looked as if Raven might be picking up clothing habits from Emma, but it was better than naked, which Charles still couldn't deal with. She even smiled at him for the comment.

"How are you feeling?" was Raven's next question as she fussed over him.

"More alert, thank heavens," he said and tried to push himself up a little further on his pillows.

That illustrated instantly that his mind might have been starting to work again, but he was still weak as a kitten. Erik was by his side almost straight away to help him.

"So," he said, once Erik and Raven had him settled again, "what do you think of the blue hair?"

It nicely deflected Raven's worry as she smiled at him. Erik just gave him a look that told him his lover knew exactly what he was doing and went to sit back down again, picking up a newspaper to give him and Raven an illusion of privacy. Charles couldn't help grinning just a little; Erik made a very peculiar mother hen.

"I think it suits you," Raven told him and reached out to touch. "I like it."

"I'm not sure it's going to go with my wardrobe though," he said, enjoying the attention; "you might have to help me with that."

Raven took his hand then and a moment of understanding passed between them that Charles had never really felt before. For the first time they were closer to the same and he couldn't help noticing where Raven's finger lightly touched his wrist, stroking gently.

"Maybe now that you are awake, Erik will stop growling at us all," Raven said and smiled over her shoulder at the other mutant. "Exactly when were you planning on telling me you two were more than friends?"

Charles felt himself blush.

"Um," he wasn't sure how to answer that one.

"Erik is very unsubtle when he's worried, so don't even think about trying to pretend," Raven told him as if she was completely unconcerned by the matter, "besides, I made him admit it on day three of your mental vacation."

He still had no idea what to say.

"Don't look so worried, no one else has caught on," she said, and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead, "and I totally see the appeal and since you're working so hard to accept me, it would be incredibly hypocritical of me to not accept you. Rather explains all the girls you went through in Oxford if you were over compensating, though."

Charles laughed, because it was that or die of mortification. He couldn't help noticing that Erik was studiously pretending not to be listening.

"I'll have you know it had nothing to do with over compensation," he told her even if he did feel like floating away in a bubble of happiness at her words. "I happen to like girls and boys," he lowered his voice, "but girls are much easier and Erik's the only man worth the trouble."

He would have used his telepathy, but he wasn't sure he wouldn't shout it out to the whole house anyway. The way Erik shifted in his chair told Charles that his lover had heard despite his low voice level.

"Just don't mess it up," Raven whispered back and smiled at him.

She then sat back and gave him a critical once over with her eyes. Why he wasn't sure, because she had to have been able to look at him while he was sleeping, but it seemed to satisfy her, so he left her to it, smiling under her scrutiny. Even with his gift almost completely shut down he could tell she had been very worried about him.

"But you haven't asked what happened to Shaw," Raven abruptly changed the subject once she was done checking him over.

"That's because I know what happened to him," he replied, the smile partially slipping off his face.

That was one part of his final moments in that room that he remembered far too clearly. He had known the subject would come up, but he had been hoping for later rather than sooner.

"You sensed that, even while you were in that much pain? Never scream like that again, okay, it was terrifying," Raven said, fluffing his pillows a bit more and giving away just how honest she was being. "Shaw's downstairs, by the way, in a secure room, but Hank says there's virtually no brain activity at all. Hank thinks his power must have fed back on him somehow and wiped his neurons."

"Hank's, wrong," he said before she could continue, "and wow, that's something I don't get to say very often."

He did not really want to talk about Shaw, but he didn't see that he had much choice. If he avoided it now he was not sure he would have the courage to reveal the truth later.

"Charles, what's wrong?" Raven asked, clearly sensing his discomfort. "This is a good thing, Shaw can't hurt anyone anymore."

Charles let his eyes flick over to Erik for a moment and found his lover watching him intently. He took a deep breath and looked Raven in the eye.

"Shaw's power didn't do it," he said, knowing that he was about to change Raven's view of him forever, "I did."

Shock flicked across Raven's face.

"You ... you can do that?"

He had never admitted that to anyone, but he nodded. Raven had always known he was capable of incredible things, but not this kind of destruction. There was a big difference between removing a memory or two and wiping out someone's mind.

"Since when," she asked quietly, squeezing his hand.

"Since I was ten," he replied and knew he would shock her again.

He had explained just about everything about his powers to her, as she had to him. They had grown up and shared their discoveries with each other, but never that.

"We had a dog, a huge thing that didn't like me very much," he decided he had to explain, "and it would always bark at me. I avoided it, but one day I was walking in the grounds and it kept barking and following me. I had a headache where I had been testing my powers and I wanted it to stop, so I lashed out. It never moved or made a sound again and my mother had one of the staff put it out of its misery. I vowed I would never use that ability again, but Shaw was too dangerous to all of you."

He couldn't look either Raven or Erik in the eye.

"That is ..." Erik didn't seem to quite know what to say.

"Horrific, petrifying?" he filled in for his lover.

"I was thinking more of astounding," Erik said and he finally looked up.

For once in his life Charles had no idea at all how to reply.

"You've lived with the knowledge you can ..." Raven trailed off.

"Wipe out another being with a single thought," he finished her sentence for her as well.

"Since you were ten," Raven said in an awed tone.

He gave a derisive little laugh and looked down, playing with the edge of his blanket nervously. That was why he was a little shocked when he found himself engulfed in a very firm hug from Raven.

"Thank you," she said, holding onto him and refusing to let go, "thank you for saving us."

He really wanted to open his mind then, to read what Raven was really thinking. He almost did as well, but he held onto his self control and hugged back instead.

"Food," she said, kind of awkwardly and much too enthusiastically when she finally pulled back, "Hank made us promise to try and get you to eat something before you fall asleep again this time. Try and stay awake and I'll bring you some soup."

Charles did his best to smile at her for that, but he felt rather off balance. When she left the room he finally met Erik's eyes again.

"I have been underestimating you, Charles," Erik said and he felt himself go cold.

He looked away again; he didn't want to be seen as a weapon, never that.

"You are more remarkable than I gave you credit for."

"Of course," he said in a self-depreciating tone, "I can destroy instantly without so much as damaging a hair on a person's head."

Erik did not reply, but walked over to him.

"And you don't," were the quiet words that made him frown. "They say absolute power corrupts absolutely, but it hasn't corrupted you."

He played with his blanket a little more and then finally looked up.

"I'm not a saint," he pointed out.

"You could kill every person who has ever threatened you or what you believe in without anyone knowing it was you, couldn't you?" Erik said.

"Not from here ..."

"If they were within your range," Erik corrected and gave him a glare that told him Erik knew he was deflecting.

It was a fact Charles lived with every day, something he refused to think about, but that hovered at the back of his mind. He had seen into Emma's mind, he knew she was powerful, but she couldn't do what he could. In that he was unique.

"Yes," he said in little more than a whisper.

It was hard admitting the truth and having his greatest secret revealed, but he had had to do it. Shaw was gone forever, he had done what he had sworn never to do, and the others needed to understand quite how dangerous he was.

"You have more self control than any person I have ever met," Erik said and carefully sat down on the bed. "I don't think I would have been as careful with such a powerful defence."

Charles laughed again, probably a little on the hysterical side, because the idea of anyone with that part of his gift scared the hell out of him, no matter how much he trusted them. He could not understand why Erik was not petrified of him.

"I don't think it would be a good idea to make this widely known," Erik said and placed a hand over his.

That made the laughter bubble up even more.

"Charles," Erik said in a very calm, gentle tone, "when you explain what you did to Hank you are going to embellish the truth. I know you will feel the need to tell him what you did, but you will tell him you have never done it before and you could only do it then because of the extreme conditions. Do you understand?"

He tried to calm himself, he honestly did, but he felt like he was about to melt down. The consequences of what he had done were beginning to hit him as he finally let himself think about it.

"Charles," Erik repeated, looking him straight in the eyes.

Finally he nodded.

"Good," Erik told him and then he found himself being gathered into a hug for a second time and he realised he was shaking. "I will explain why the lie is necessary to Raven when she returns. All you have to worry about is finishing your recovery."

Of course it was not that simple, but Charles took the comfort for what it was worth. By the time Raven came back with a tray of soup, bread and tea he almost had a hold of himself and actually formed a smile. He even managed to eat the soup without his hands shaking too much.

~*~

"What do you think you're doing?"

Charles had just about managed to push himself out of bed and into a standing position, but he sat down very rapidly as Raven's loud voice distracted him.

"I was just going to the bathroom before you barged in," he said and gave her a level stare.

"You're not supposed to be out of bed," Raven protested and walked over to him. "Hank says your energy levels are still all over the place and you could hurt yourself."

He suddenly had a longing for the sweet, irresponsible sister who appeared to have been replaced by one who was hell bent on making sure he did exactly as he was told at all times.

"I've be lying in bed for over two days since I woke up," he pointed out, even as he tried to gather enough energy to stand up again.

"Mostly sleeping," Raven pointed out before he could go on.

"I would just like to go to the bathroom by myself," and he knew it came out as a whine, but he couldn't help it.

He hated being virtually helpless.

Raven put her hands on her hips and gave him a very serious look.

"Please," he wasn't above begging.

At that Raven sighed and came over to him.

"I'm helping you," she said and his aversion to that must have shown on his face because she laughed at him. "To the bathroom and back again," she clarified and rolled her eyes, "the rest I do not need to see."

He managed to laugh as well then; he really was off his game at the moment.

"Thank you," he replied and let Raven help him to stand up again.

His strength was returning slowly, but the confrontation with Shaw seemed to have taken a great deal out of him. Everyone of their little family had trouped in and out of his room to say hello since he woke up, but he really wanted to be up and around so he could find out what was going on with the newcomers as well. He did not like being out of the loop.

The trip to the bathroom was uneventful at least and he felt much happier when Raven helped him back into bed.

"So how's everything going today?" he asked as he settled back among his myriad of pillows; he was sure they were breeding, or possibly Erik was sneaking more in every day.

Erik point blank refused to give him all the details of what was going on in the house, so he had to rely on Raven.

"Still a bit us and them," Raven told him with a smile, "but no one's tried to kill anyone else this morning which is good. Emma offered to take me and Angel shopping if we wanted to go, which is what I was coming up here to ask you about."

The idea of letting Raven out of the safety of the mansion, especially with Emma Frost made him want to instantly say no, but he held himself in check. Raven was perfectly capable of taking care of herself and she clearly trusted Emma. Since they had left Moira behind with the rest of the CIA, Raven had had no older female company and she had definitely taken a shine to Emma.

"Just don't bankrupt us," he said and conjured up a smile.

Raven squealed and clapped her hands before giving him a hug.

"We'll go after lunch," she said, bouncing happily, "did you need anything?"

He shook his head.

"No thank you, you just have a good time."

Raven beamed at him, which made him incredibly happy because there seemed to be no residual discomfort from his confession about Shaw. It had been a little awkward all that evening, but since, Raven seemed to have adjusted to the new information. When he had told Hank, their young genius had started making theories about what the energy surge could have done to Charles' brain in that instant to make it possible and hadn't even seemed to register the whole dangerous part.

"While you're here," he said, pushing his thoughts onto other things, "would you mind if I, ah, practised a little on you," and he waved his fingers in the general direction of his temple. "I wouldn't go deep or anything, it's just I seem to have turned up the volume somehow and I think I need to recalibrate."

"Turned up the volume?" Raven asked and went from happy to worried.

"When I open my mind everything's a lot clearer and louder," he did his best to explain, "and the one time I tried to speak to Erik he seemed to think I was shouting at him. I think I might have had to push so hard with Shaw that my levels are a bit skewed."

"You're sure it's not to do with the whole eye thing?"

They hadn't really discussed the new additions to his mutation, but he had had to explain what had happened to Hank, so he had done the same with Raven.

"I don't see how," he said, "I don't feel any different when it happens, I just see things in a different way."

Exactly what the transmuted energy had done to him was a mystery and they were waiting until after he was recovered to dig deeper, but he was almost sure it had done little to his telepathy.

"Okay," Raven said, apparently satisfied, "but no digging around for personal information and no pushing yourself too hard."

Charles grinned and placed his hand over his heart.

"Word of honour," he said and lifted his fingers to his temple. [ _How's this?_ ]

Raven winced just a little.

[ _You are shouting,_ ] she replied and he winced in return.

This was going to take some practice.


	4. Towards the Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See ch 1

The fourth day after he first woke up Charles decided he was going to breakfast. He was feeling a lot stronger and he was fed up of lying around. He was almost into his clothes when Erik opened his door and peered in.

"I'm getting up," he said before Erik could say anything.

Erik had made it a habit to come and find out what he wanted for breakfast and then bring it to him on a tray, but he wasn't having that today.

"Did Hank clear you?"

"Hank can go jump off a bridge," Charles snapped back and then winced apologetically. "Sorry, I sometimes get peevish when I'm ill."

Erik closed the door and then leant next to it, just watching him.

"You're not going to tell me I can't?"

"Would it do any good?" Erik asked in response.

Charles smiled, for once it didn't look as if Erik was going to be difficult about something.

"If you can make it downstairs you're perfectly welcome to eat with everyone else."

Charles narrowed his eyes; he didn't overly like Erik's tone.

"If you're trying to say something you'd better just tell me ,because I'm staying firmly inside my own head at the moment," he said, picking up his pullover.

"I didn't know you had it in you," Erik replied, apparently in a mood to just watch him and smirk,

"I am quite capable of walking down to breakfast," Charles protested and stood up.

It took every ounce of will he had not to wobble as he realised he had climbed to his feet too fast, but he was not failing on this one. The gauntlet had been thrown down and he couldn't back out now, even if he did have to blink away the spots in front of his eyes.

He strode out of the room as confidently as he could manage and then turned and waited for Erik to follow him. The fact was, he was perfectly fine and that's all there was to it.

By the end of the landing he was winded and he had to stop completely at the top of the stairs to give himself a chance to recover and stop his legs shaking.

"I can help you back to your room," Erik suggested at his elbow at which point he straightened up and glared at his lover.

There was no way in hell he was going back to bed.

The stairs were interesting to say the least and he did feel a gentle tug on his person more than once when it looked as if he might take a header straight to the bottom. Erik was a nice safe presence behind him and he was well aware he should just give up, but his stubborn streak was fully engaged. Hanging on to the banister at the bottom the walk down the corridor to the dining room looked like a hike up Mount Everest.

"Charles," Erik said and he refused to look at the other man.

He was going to breakfast if it killed him. When he let go of the banister he discovered that his legs were not really au fait with the idea. His knees felt like jelly and he wobbled precariously.

"You are the most stubborn man I know," Erik said, gently catching him around the waist and under one arm.

"Looked in the mirror lately," he replied, but leant into Erik none the less.

"Come on then," Erik said and took quite a lot of his weight for him, "you cannot make a big entrance from here."

He was a little surprised, Erik didn't usually give ground when his lover had laid down the rules.

"Thank you," he said, blushing as he realised quite what an idiot he was being.

"Just promise me that after breakfast I can install you in the library and you won't go trying to check up on everything through the house," Erik replied and brushed a kiss over his temple.

Charles smiled and nodded; he might not enjoy being laid up, but he did rather enjoy Erik looking after him. Erik's protective tendencies had even led them to decide that they weren't going to hide their relationship anymore either. They hadn't made a grand announcement, but neither of them was trying to seem to be anything they were not.

They made their way down the corridor at a gentle pace and Charles felt a lot less wobbly by the time they reached the dining room. Raven, Alex, Sean and Hank were all already inside having breakfast, apparently under the watchful eye of Emma Frost. There was no sign of any of the mansion's other residents.

"What are you doing down here?" Raven asked the moment she saw him.

"He's a stubborn bastard," Erik filled in for him.

He couldn't exactly argue with that, although he might have contested the language if he hadn't had his eyes fixed very firmly on what looked like a nice comfortable chair.

"I was bored," was the best comeback he could manage as Erik guided him across the room and he collapsed into a seat.

"Do not move," Erik told him, "I will get you some food."

"Not sure I could if I wanted to," he admitted with a sheepish smile and let Erik mother him.

"You look like you just ran a marathon," Raven said, as tactful as ever.

"Yes, well the stairs were a bit of a challenge solo," he replied and reached for the tea pot that was in the middle of the table.

Raven turned her glare onto Erik.

"You let him come down the stairs on his own in his condition?" she sounded as if she was ready to launch into a full on scolding.

"My condition is fine," he said, cutting her off at the pass, "and I'm pretty sure Erik made sure I didn't end up at the bottom the fast way at least three times, so leave him alone."

[ _Irresponsible, stubborn men,_ ] Raven sent at him very directly.

[ _Over protective, nagging, women,_ ] Charles sent back.

Raven glared at him some more and he could feel everyone around the table tensing for the explosion, but instead Raven's lips twitched. Then she laughed.

"Just tell me you are not intending on going for any long walks in the near future," she said, shaking her head.

"Oh, not you too," he replied and rolled his eyes; "I just needed to get out of my room, I am not that stupid."

The look both Erik and Raven sent him said otherwise and made Alex laugh, which he decided to accept with good grace. Emma made no comment whatsoever except to raise her eyebrows when he looked in her direction and Sean was apparently keeping well out of it. When Erik placed a plate of food in front of him big enough for at least three people he just sighed and set about eating as much of it as he could.

~*~

Sitting in the library with a good book, but so that he could see out into the grounds when he wanted to, was relaxing and liberating at the same time. He had begun to think the walls of his room were closing in on him from looking at them so much. Raven had tucked a blanket over his knees so he didn't get cold and he hadn't had the heart to say no, so on his knees it still was.

People kept stopping by just to chat as they put it, to check up on him was the way he interpreted it. Several times he had to wonder if they had forgotten he was a telepath, because Sean barely managed to hide any of his irritation at having been sent on Professor X duty, as the young mutant so cheerfully thought of it. He really was going to have to start teaching them to shield their minds from random broadcasting.

Even so, he was surprised when it was Emma Frost who walked in as his third visitor.

"Hello," he said and smiled, "don't tell me Raven and Erik have you on babysitting duty as well."

Emma did not smile, but she did move to sit down.

"No," she replied very formally, "I wanted to speak to you and this is the first chance I have had to get you alone."

That was very upfront and Charles put his book aside.

"How can I help you?" he asked.

"I wasn't going to come here after everything was over," she told him, her gaze never wavering from his eyes, "then I felt what you did to Shaw."

A chill ran up his spine.

"I thought you were a weak idealist," she told him very bluntly, "you have a very good disguise."

"It's not a disguise, Miss Frost," he said, not liking where this conversation was going.

"But it is, Professor," she told him, seemingly perfectly sure of herself, "if it weren't I would have taken Shaw's money, Azazel and Riptide and gone my own way. You may be an idealist on the outside, but I felt how you reacted, felt what you did. You have the strength to do what needs to be done if the situation arises."

He opened his mouth to protest.

[ _That was a compliment, Professor,_ ] she placed directly into his mind. [ _You might not like it, but it's the way of the world._ ]

Not sure quite how to reply, he sat there and thought about it for a while. She was right, he didn't like it, but he had seen too much not to understand her point of view. He remembered seeing into Emma's mind in the alternative timeline, he knew she had had a life much harder than his own. He did not agree with her perspective, but he could empathise with it

"Please call me, Charles," is what he eventually decided to say.

~*~

Being up and about, even with limited mobility, was definitely good for Charles. He was using a lot more energy, so he was eating more, which in turn was boosting his strength, so he was quickly pottering about the mansion and the terrace. His chat with Emma had been very enlightening and he'd also managed to have conversations with Azazel and Riptide or Janos as Charles had discovered.

Azazel was definitely much older than he looked and very, very angry about something, but Charles had chosen not to broach that subject yet. Janos, on the other hand had been almost chatty. He had found the other mutant covered in grease trying to fix one of the cars in the garage. Janos hadn't actually said anything out loud, but they had had a very lively mental conversation.

He still couldn't work out if Janos didn't speak because the other mutant couldn't or because Janos chose not to. The wind spinner was much more complicated than Charles had given the man credit for.

Of course there was one more person at the mansion left to see after that and he knew he couldn't put it off forever.

"I was thinking of seeing Shaw this afternoon," he said casually as he walked to lunch with Erik.

The way Erik actually twitched gave him a hint that his lover was not comfortable with the idea.

"Why?" The question was terse and hard, much like the Erik Charles had first met all those weeks ago.

"I need to see him with my own eyes," he admitted, because that was most of it, "and then I need to scan him to make sure he is completely gone."

According to Hank, Emma had done the honours as well, but Charles needed to do it himself.

"Then what?"

"Then, if his mind is destroyed, we deliver him to the CIA," he replied. "They can figure out what to do with him."

He felt a momentary stab of shock from Erik at his callous tone.

"You don't want to rehabilitate him?" Erik sounded genuinely surprised.

[ _I want that bastard as far away from all of us as physically possible,_ ] he replied, not bothering to hide his complete loathing of the idea of Shaw being in his house. [ _Good riddance to bad rubbish._ ]

He prided himself on his compassion for others, his empathy, but what Shaw had done to Erik was unforgivable. Shaw deserved nothing from them.

"I will come with you," Erik said without further comment and it was settled.

One of the cellar rooms had been turned into a secure room for Shaw and as Charles approached it later on his knees felt a little weak for an entirely different reason to fatigue. Shaw could have cost him everything. Shaw had almost taken away what was his. Shaw had made him into a killer.

No matter how he tried to rationalise it, that was what he was. Shaw's body might be living and breathing, but Shaw was as dead as it was possible to be. According to Hank only the autonomic nervous system actually still seemed to be functioning in Shaw's brain, everything else was devoid of electrical activity. Charles didn't doubt Hank's word, but he just had to see himself.

"Breathe, Charles," Erik said quietly as he opened the door.

Charles did his best to remember how and stepped into the room.

Shaw was lying in the bed connected to various machines, eyes just staring at nothing. There was a feeding tube up the man's nose as well as an IV in his arm and he looked small and helpless.

Even so he felt Erik tensing beside him. When he glanced at his lover, Erik had unconsciously put his hand in his pocket where the Nazi coin always sat. Charles reached out and touched his arm gently; it appeared they were both having trouble with this meeting.

[ _You would only be killing a shell,_ ] he said silently, [ _he is not worth it._ ]

Erik's jaw was set in a tight knot, but Charles felt a small mental touch back which reassured him.

"Hello, Hank," he said, because the young scientist had been waiting for them, "is it okay if I just get on and do this?"

"Um, yes," was the usual, somewhat hesitant reply.

Placing his fingers to his temple, Charles refused to let himself doubt or falter and pushed his mind towards Shaw. What he found was rather shocking.

"Charles?" Erik asked when he had been standing there several seconds.

"Nothing," he said quietly, "absolutely nothing."

With human beings there was always something there, even those in comas, but looking into Shaw's head there wasn't even a mind to find. He was not looking at a human mind put back to square one so everything needed to be relearned, he was looking at the absence of all thought.

"Hank's right," he said, swallowing hard as he suddenly felt slightly nauseous, "there are no higher brain functions. I think we should arrange to have Mr Shaw deposited on the CIA's doorstep. Making it look like a KGB job will give them something else to think about other than us. They'll probably spend months trying to get information out of him."

Erik didn't say a word, just nodded and then turned and left.

"Thank you, Hank," Charles said before following. "I'll talk to you tomorrow about studying my new additions, if that's okay."

Hank gave him a half smiled and nodded, at which point Charles let himself flee the room.

"I need a drink," he said as he met Erik in the corridor.

There was no argument from his lover and this time he was glad to head back to his room and the bottle of scotch he had on the sideboard.

~*~

"I don't know why it happens," Charles confessed and looked over at Hank, "I'm not sure I can do it to order."

Hank had him wired up to several impressive looking machines, but so far there wasn't a lot of data to record, at least not from his brain. He had started off sitting in the chair beside the table, but that had made him uncomfortable because he remembered the wheelchair, so he was sitting cross-legged on the table now. He'd received a very odd look from Hank, but the young genius had not complained.

"Twice when I've seen you do it you were coming out of sleep," Erik said and Charles turned to see his lover standing in the doorway.

He was totally aware that Erik seemed to show up wherever he was sooner rather than later. Erik was keeping an eye on him and he couldn't say he really minded.

"Do you object to chairs now?" Erik asked, walking up beside him.

"Only ones like that," he said and looked at the chair in question. It was utilitarian, squarish and had arms and it had been too close for comfort. With Shaw dealt with he was managing to push the memories of that alternative future away, but only slowly.

Erik gave him the look, but did not push. He was going to have to tell Erik the truth about the future he had seen, eventually, but he was putting it off.

"Hmm ... I could try meditating I suppose," he said, flipping back to their original subject. "Maybe it only happens when my mind is in a less active state."

"It's worth a go," Hank agreed, looking at yet another reading.

"Just so you know, Raven says you have another half an hour, then she's coming in here to get you if you don't appear and eat something," Erik told them with one of his half smiles.

Charles grinned, Raven was actually turning into a very responsible young woman, at least when it came to making sure he was kept in line. Hank was really going to be in trouble when Charles was completely better and Raven turned her attentions to her almost boyfriend.

"We will do our very best to be there," he said, reaching out and letting his fingers dance across Erik's hand.

If he had been allowed to meditate on Erik he would have been a very happy man. His lover had finally deigned to do more than just share his bed for sleeping the previous night, although it had been little more than some heavy petting, and it had put Charles into a very good mood. He let his mind drift back to their early morning awakening which had been gentle and loving as Erik woke him with a kiss and his eyes drifted shut. Erik was so beautiful when he was unguarded.

"That's it," Hank said excitedly, "keep doing that."

Charles snapped his eye open again to find that his surroundings were black and filled with bright edges. It felt very strange, alien, but he fought the urge to push back to normality. He turned and allowed himself to study Erik properly for the first time like that. It was utterly strange, but Erik still looked amazing to him.

[ _Your eyes really are stunning,_ ] slipped into his mind and he smiled.

[ _You're getting very good at projecting at me,_ ] he replied, doing his very best to keep his mental voice gentle.

The sudden jump in his range and volume was still giving him a little trouble.

"Charles, you're messing up my results," Hank complained and then seemed to remember who he was talking to.

"Sorry," Charles said, doing his best to keep a straight face as Hank looked incredibly embarrassed.

The room around him really did look strange, but the more he held onto the bizarre vision the more it seemed to make sense.

"Any idea what I'm doing?" he asked as he watched Hank play with his machines.

"I think you might be accessing some form of energy spectrum not at the visual level," Hank said, sounding lost in the science again. "I've never seen readings like these before. Do you feel any different?"

"Not really," he replied, "it's just a little odd and I feel slightly off balance, as if my inner ear isn't quite working correctly."

"Fascinating," Hank said and Charles shared a grin with Erik.

Hank was making notes like they were going out of fashion.

"Would you mind putting these on for me, please?" Hank asked and Charles found himself being passed what looked like goggles.

It was difficult to tell exactly, given that he could only see outlines, but he slipped them over his head and onto his face. Then he looked around a bit more and tried to figure out what the goggles were supposed to have done.

"Not seeing any difference," he said and looked over to Hank for clarification.

"None at all?" Erik asked from beside him.

"No, nothing, why?"

"The goggles are polarised in both directions, Charles," Hank provided the explanation.

"Really?" he asked and managed to lose his focus, at which point everything really was just black.

He slipped the goggles off, quite excited.

"Sorry," he apologised, "I lost my concentration, but this is very interesting. We're going to have to test this out after dark, see how useful I am if I can do it to order."

He grinned at Erik who was giving him a long suffering expression.

"Not tonight of course," he said and laughed, "or I think Erik might lock me in my room for my own safety."

"You are not up to full strength yet," Erik pointed out.

"I have to agree," Hank said, siding with Erik, "you really shouldn't push yourself for at least another couple of days. You've always had quite extreme energy spikes and lows, but you're not settled back to even that yet."

"See," Erik said, rather too smug for Charles' liking.

"Yes, Mummy," he replied and gave Erik his most innocent, wide eyed look and watched his lover blush.

It was hard to make Erik blush, so he scored himself a point and then licked his lips, just to see if he could make Erik blush for an entirely different reason.

"Right, well," Hank said awkwardly, "I think that's probably enough for today. I recommend some light exercise later if you feel up to it to increase your stamina."

Charles was enjoying himself so much he didn't feel the least bit bashful about outright flirting. He had been in many, many people's minds; he knew quite how much of a sexual animal human beings were and he refused to apologise for what he felt for Erik. He gave Hank a grin and then turned his attention back to his lover.

"See, Erik," Charles said, making himself the picture of innocence again, "Hank wants me to build up my stamina."

He had never seen Hank flee a room quite so fast.

"And people think I am the evil one," Erik commented, but leaning down to kiss Charles anyway.

~*~

Charles turned up bright and early the next morning at Hank's lab for more tests and found Hank bent over the microscope.

"Working on your serum?" he asked as he walked down the room.

"No, looking at your cells actually," Hank replied absently, "although the serum is coming along nicely, I've retargeted the mutant cells and added an adaption quotient."

"To do what, precisely?" he asked, unsure of quite what Hank was telling him.

"Well I thought about what you said," Hank told him, looking up and turning, "and it made me reassess the general principle. In the other timeline I must have pushed my mutation to the limit, probably something very useful in the long run, but I'm really not sure I want to be blue all the time."

Charles could understand that.

"So you want to increase the mutation without the extreme physical form?" he asked, still unclear on the principle.

"Actually I was more interested in attaining a variable mutation, one I could turn on and off," Hank explained, eyes alight with scientific curiosity, "like Miss Frost's diamond form."

Charles had never considered it from that angle before.

"And you think you can do that?" he asked, genuinely amazed at Hank's daring.

"It's quite difficult to isolate all the factors," Hank replied, "and I'm not there yet, but I think I'm close. Mutant adaptability really is spectacular, it's amazing what are cells are capable off even disassociated from our main mutations."

Charles could feel a long discussion coming on, but he really didn't have time for that right at the moment. Nearly all the preparations were ready to give Shaw back to the CIA and he wanted to get back to them once the lab session was over. He wanted Shaw gone.

"So, what's so fascinating about mine, then?" he asked, easily diverting Hank back to the topic at hand.

"Oh," Hank said glancing back at the microscope, "I think you're younger than you used to be."

"What?" he asked, far more shocked by the fact than Hank seemed to be. "How is that possible, and how can you tell?"

He wasn't aware of any test that would be able to show that.

"Oh, I checked the regeneration potential of your cells," Hank said, as if it was something everyone knew how to do. "As we age it decreases, yours has increased since I tested that blood sample you gave me at your first physical."

Charles was a little stunned.

"Miss Frost explained that Shaw absorbed energy to stay young," Hank continued to elucidate. "I theorise that when his energy blast hit you it had a similar effect. I'd like to set up a series of tests to see the progression if you don't mind."

"No, not at all," he replied, still a little dazed. "Just remember my blood supply is not unlimited," he added, just for good measure.

Hank was sometimes overenthusiastic.

"How much younger?" he asked when his brain finally caught up again.

"A couple of years at least I would estimate," Hank replied and Charles had to smile.

From losing his sister as well as the man he loved and being crippled, he had gone to keeping everything and was younger to boot. He was going to have to tease Erik about taking advantage of younger men later; it was too good an opportunity to pass up.

~*~

Charles could not move. His arms were stretched out in front of him, almost to their limits and his ankles were spread and held firmly in place. He could barely shift, held helpless with his arse in the air and completely vulnerable.

"Erik, please," he begged, so strung out he could barely think.

"Not yet, Charles," Erik all but purred at him, "I don't think you've had enough."

He whimpered as the metal dildo moved in and out of his arse with torturous slowness and the metal chain tightened ever so slightly around the base of his aching cock. The key hanging from it tinkled gently and did nothing to help his need. He had never realised he could feel so desperate.

Teasing Erik had some interesting consequences it seemed and revenge was a dish best served cold. It had been two days before Erik had made him pay up.

When Erik had produced the dildo, Charles was pretty sure he had blushed scarlet, but the evil twinkle in Erik's eye had had his cock hardening so fast he'd felt dizzy. Apparently Erik had been practicing with his powers; the dildo had once been several pieces of stainless steel cutlery from the drawer in the kitchen which were now all welded into one perfectly smooth device.

Sexual aids were not something Charles had much experience with personally, but it hadn't taken more than Erik's inquisitive look to convince him.

The fact that he was being held in place and beautifully tortured, all while Erik was leaning casually against that wall, stroking his own cock slowly, right in Charles' line of vision was absolutely bloody marvellous. In all honesty, Charles had never considered that he might like being dominated; he definitely didn't outside the bedroom, but he was becoming kind of a slut inside it. He could not get enough of Erik's cock or anything Erik wanted to do to him; it would have been embarrassing if it hadn't been so damn good.

The dildo was moving in and out with smooth efficiency, every single time hitting what he knew anatomically was his prostate, but in his head was now just a button that lit up most of the nerves in his body every time it was pressed.

"Please, Erik, I'll do anything." He needed Erik's touch, that connection that the physical brought with it.

"You sound desperate, Charles," Erik said, without moving from his position.

Erik was never really very vocal when they had sex, but his voice always took on such gravelly tones that Charles was helpless each time his lover spoke.

"I am," he said, spreading one hand and reaching for Erik, even though he was still held firmly in place, "I need you. Please."

He was pretty sure he could never explain it to a non-telepath, not even by showing them. The dildo was stimulating him, but it could never be enough, not when Erik was just out of touching distance and Erik had forbidden him from reaching out with his mind.

He actually whimpered when Erik finally laid a hand on his back and shuddered at the contact.

"No telepathy, Charles," Erik told him even as he was reigning himself in, because he so wanted to touch mentally as well. "Later."

It was only the promise of later that helped him hold on.

Erik climbed onto the bed, stroking down his back while moving down behind him. Then the dildo was removed in one swift motion and the chain tightened again for a moment, as if to make sure that didn't make him come.

"Oh god," he said, more one explosive sound than two words as Erik replaced the dildo with himself.

"So open, Charles," Erik whispered, "so ready for me."

"Always ready for you," he replied, even as Erik began to move just as smoothly and accurately as the dildo had.

It was so different though, because he could feel Erik, even with his telepathy dialled right down, Erik was present and just there. Beyond everything else, that was what he needed the most. He was right on the edge, had been for ages, but the chain helped him keep back from going over. Erik was pushing him closer and closer, pumping into him again and again and he wanted it to go on forever.

That was why when it suddenly stopped he made a very obvious sound of disappointment and loss. He found that he was free to move as well and his sex soaked brain couldn't work out what was going on.

"I want to see you," Erik told him, "all of you," and promptly lay down on the bed.

Charles got the idea when Erik motioned to him to climb on and he pulled himself together enough to lift himself up, swing his leg over and lowered himself down onto Erik's waiting cock.

"Now you can touch me," Erik told him, helping to hold him up with arms and mutant power. "Take it slow."

It was a complete switch from being helpless to being virtually in control, but it took every ounce of willpower Charles had not to let the flood gates open. He settled onto Erik's cock, placing his hands flat on Erik's hard abdominal muscles and began to move as slowly as he dared, using the pace to gradually touch his mind to Erik's as well.

After the hard and sure pounding Erik had been giving him, this was almost a meditation and he put his head back and closed his eyes. He let his mind stroke around the edges of Erik's as he rocked his hips, slowly, ever so slowly allowing his thoughts to trickle into his lover's and vice versa. He was still on the edge, but it was as if he was floating there now rather than clinging on by the skin of his teeth. He was light headed and needy, but somehow serene at the same time.

"Look at me, Charles," Erik told him and he opened his eyes.

It was only half a shock to find the room black with neon edges and he looked down at Erik, taking in his lover's naked form.

"So beautiful," Erik whispered, reaching up one hand to touch his face.

"All yours," he replied, sinking further into Erik's mind, showing him, feeling him and loving him.

He let his instincts lead, allowing his arousal to build until it was almost too much and then leaning forward. Erik met him halfway for the kiss, moving to hold his shoulders to bring them together and as their lips touched he let the connection complete. He sank onto Erik's cock, into Erik's mind and everything kind of shifted.

It was impossible to tell who came first and it wasn't instant and explosive, more like a burn that went on and on as their bodies gave in to orgasm. Charles felt energy move within him and he felt more complete than he ever had in his entire life. He couldn't breathe and he couldn't consciously move, but in those many seconds it didn't matter in the slightest.

Of course when reality flipped back in, he reared back gasping for breath as Erik fell back to the bed doing the same. His whole body was shaking and his eyesight had flashed back to normal and he wasn't quite sure what had just happened. That had been the strangest orgasm of his life and given what he and Erik had been up to recently that was saying something.

[ _What?_ ] was about as far as he could get with sensible thought and he didn't even consider speaking out loud.

"I think," Erik said, carefully helping him off his body and onto the bed, "we may have found out what happens when I push you too far."

[ _Didn't feel like too far,_ ] he said, doing his best to put his thoughts in some semblance of order.

"How many fingers?" Erik asked and held up one hand.

Charles would have laughed, only it was really hard to count even when he did focus. He realised he felt a little punch drunk.

[ _I think I'm going to sleep now,_ ] he said and closed his eyes without even waiting for Erik to reply.

"Charles," he heard, but that was about all before he sank happily into blissful oblivion.

~*~

"Hank," Charles said, dragging Erik behind him, "can you do that test you did on me on Erik?"

They had woken up half an hour ago and Erik had been able to persuade him to wait long enough to take a shower before dragging them both to see Hank. As soon as he had opened his eyes he had remembered the previous evening and he had realised what he had actually done.

"Sure," Hank replied looking at them both, "but why?"

"Because last night I think I dumped some of the energy in me into Erik," he replied with complete openness.

"Why? When?" Hank asked, ever the scientist.

"Hank, trust me when I say you do not want to know that," he said, even as Erik laughed. "Just believe that I think I did and go from there."

Erik did not seem to think the situation remotely a problem, but Charles wanted to be totally sure.

Hank went a lovely scarlet colour.

"I'll need a blood sample," Hank said, covering his embarrassment with science.

Two hours later, Hank had put both of them through a rather large number of tests.

"You're showing the same de-aging as Charles," Hank told Erik eventually, "but none of the residual trace energy."

Hank then turned to Charles.

"Nothing about your tests results have changed."

Charles was relieved and yet very unsure at the same time.

"See," Erik said, eyebrows slightly raised and as open as it ever got when they weren't alone, "nothing to worry about."

Charles opened his mouth to reply, but really wasn't sure he had anything to say.

"Thank you, Hank," Erik said and calmly steered Charles towards the door, "I think he needs tea, he hasn't had any yet this morning and I don't think his brain starts properly without it."

Now Erik was making jokes at his expense and he still didn't know what to say.

"Charles, relax," Erik told him as they stepped into the corridor, "I am well, you are well, leave it at that."

"But I ..." he started to reply.

"Gave yourself to me in every way possible," Erik said and smiled, "do not over think it."

"Oh god, I did not need to hear that," Alex's pained voice came from the open library door, out of which the young mutant was just stepping.

The look he was giving them was enough to crack Charles' worry and he actually laughed. Subtle hints were well in the past it seemed.

~*~

"I have a plan," Charles said to the assembled group.

He called everyone together now that he was back to full strength.

"Is that a good thing?" Alex asked and Charles grinned.

"This time, yes," he replied and looked over to Erik who was watching him carefully, "at least I think it is, which is why we're having this discussion. It will take time and it will mean we have to live double lives, but I believe it can work."

"More hiding, Charles?" Erik asked, clearly not impressed.

He hadn't needed to use his gift to know that objection was coming.

"Yes and no," he explained, totally serious again. "The first job will be to wipe knowledge of who exactly we are and what we are capable of from the last remaining CIA members."

Erik raised an eyebrow.

"You can do that, but won't they know they've forgotten something?" Emma asked, grabbing his attention.

"I'm not going to remove everything and I'm going to leave them me," he replied with a smile, "I'm just not going to let them remember what I do."

"Surely that leaves you exposed," was Erik's instant response.

"Since I plan on being the face of mutant relations, that's not really a problem."

"You can't do that," Raven all but exploded; "they'll come after you."

"And through you, us," Hank pointed out.

Charles smiled.

"I was thinking more of it as hiding in plain sight," he began to outline his plan. "The government is afraid of us, they will want the country to be afraid of us so they can control us. Humanity is afraid of what it does not understand, so I intend to explain."

"But if they know what we can really do they'll be even more afraid," Sean said, looking worried for the first time.

"Which is why we lie."

That stopped all the objections in their tracks and he sat back in his chair pleased with the reaction. No one was really used to him being the one to instigate outright deceit, misdirection yes, complete falsehood no.

"Go on," Erik said, speaking for everyone it seemed.

"I've had quite a lot of time to think lately," Charles said, grinning, "and I believe we should fight misinformation with our own misinformation. I'm good at speeches and if I go on television and explain how mutants are humanity striving to survive with all the pollution governments are throwing into the atmosphere and how we're all harmless and loveable I think I can swing it. Well as long as we don't let Erik on TV as well that is."

[ _You will pay for that remark,_ ] Eric told him silently and he just let his grin grow wider.

[ _I hope so._ ]

"Will you two stop flirting for one minute," Raven complained and Charles rolled his eyes at her.

"But we're not all harmless," Darwin pointed out and dragged them back on topic.

"They don't know that," he replied, feeling quite pleased with himself. "I have a whole paper planned about the natural forces that can gather around a mutant when their mutations first appear and cause strange phenomenon. It would be like blaming a bunny rabbit for a thunderstorm and no one could possibly do that."

He gave them his best big-eyed sell.

"Shit," Alex said, blinking at him, "it might actually work."

"Here and places like here," Charles continued...

"You are thinking big," Emma interrupted him.

"Will be havens; places mutants can be who they are," he just nodded at her question; "out there we encourage humanity to recognise us, to understand us and hide anything too alarming. By the time they realise there is more to us it will be too late and we will already be right where we want to be."

"But what about governments," Erik said, "they have known about people like us for years; they have experimented on us."

"Even a harmless bacteria occasionally produces a mutation which can be deadly," Charles replied, "and just like in nature these strains usually burn themselves out very quickly. Isolated incidents have been reported in the past, but with mutation becoming more widespread such evolutionary dead ends are few and far between."

He gave the whole speech as if talking to a concerned citizen and Erik actually smiled.

"You have thought of everything."

Charles inclined his head at the acknowledgement.

"It won't be easy," he admitted, because he had thought of a hundred pit falls, "but I think we can do it. We need to make humanity accept us, no matter what we look like, and then we need to spread into every walk of life. When homo superior can be found in politics, big business, medicine, the military and everywhere else; then they will have no defence against us."

"It will take decades," Angel said, sounding slightly in awe.

"Yes," Charles replied, "but our children will be free."

It was a high goal, but as he looked around the table he could see each person beginning to accept it.

"No more superhero stuff?" Sean asked and sounded somewhat disappointed.

"Oh, now that's a whole different question," Charles said and grinned again.

"Oh lord, what's he thinking now?" Raven said and put her hand to her head.

Charles just laughed.

 **The End**   



End file.
